"Longing"....

At a point where I'm lost for words
at the end with jus my heart
it's much too cliche
but I'll give it all
than to lye in wait
never knowing
a perfect moment

it's tough that time is against us
your touch fleeting
I miss you so damn much..
as if I do not have enough on my mind
i'm tired of the world
waking up beside you
a memory by which I last each day

I figure I might be obsessed
cos I get nothing done
shut my eyes
and you're standing before me
but ending far too soon
your face etched into my hands
arms outstretched
my silent cry

it hurts to love
so hard, so fast, so real
a tear is shed today
for a tomorrow that is brighter
a painful past
an unsure future
i know not what it holds
promise..
hold nothing back


I've gazed into your eyes a thousand times before.. I've held your hand and kissed your cheek.. and each time I hold you close... i secretly wish.. you would embrace me as you own.. but you show no willingness to open your soul.. it hurts me.. that you shown me nothing after all this time.. i was helpless lost and unsure.. it hurts me.. that you've shunned me.. locked your feelings away.. now i blame you for all the turmoil i feel inside.. i know not love.. or how to love.. i know neither what i want.. nor who to trust..

and as the song goes...............

"A lifetime of fear.. so close to the edge ready to leap off..
Caution flutters in the wind.. This one leap..
and theres no turning back.. Fly or die.."

A fantasy is truly ethereal until you wake up and realize its nothing but thin air, the lines for my fantasy gal always existed but she is nothing but thin air for me till now........................ if only...only if