About a boy

Sourav Chandidas Ganguly - Contribution of Epic Proportions

2008-11-14T20:23:00.003+05:30

Thank You ..... for being a magnificent player...for success...for trails and tribulations....for courage and conviction...

Dada....as you walk away with your head held high.....v know that You did it Your Way and Indian Cricket is better for it.

Goodbye Gilly....

2008-01-28T13:18:00.000+05:30

Goodbye Gilly..................... Cricket will Miss You !!! Thank You for all the MAGIC.

P.S. See you in the IPL.

The Indian Wedding Season

2007-09-04T17:00:00.000+05:30

Gone-Soon (we hope) WeddingIts wedding season in India and I'm Gulti.

*waits for laughter to die down*

I don't understand The Great Indian Wedding (TM). Come to think of it, I don't understand marriage at all. But since this is the season of The Great Indian Wedding, I'll stick to ranting about The Great Indian Wedding.

Weddings are supposed to be ceremonies and occasions where two people celebrate their love and union. What absolute bullshit romanticist baap.

A wedding is an occasion used to "celebrate" a date that one out of the two people involved will try to forget for every single year of their married life. It is also an occasion to celebrate the date that one partner will forget ever year, leading the other partner to not give the first partner Sex.

The wedding is an occasion to "celebrate" one's bondage to another person for life. To celebrate this occasion, first, the two people in question walk around a fire until seven rounds are complete, or they get dizzy, whichever comes first. Other people wear suits that were made six years ago and feel a bit tight around the armpits, and watch them take these rounds. Then, to celebrate further, they fling coloured rice at the couple. If you're lucky, one bit gets the bride in the eye and she bleeds to death. If you're unlucky, she just bleeds and lives and the ceremony is stretched further.

Then, to celebrate further, the couple stands on a stage for roughly 321423234 hours with a "Look Batman, I am The Joker" smile stuck on their face, while they shake hands with half the population of Guatemala, whom they have never seen before and will never see again.
Then these people eat free food and go home to bitch about how crap the food was. Twats.
Me? I'm practical. I've told my parents straight off; Gulti or no gulti, I'm not getting married. Why on earth would I put a woman through the torture of being married to me?! I've told em they can have the mehendi, the sangeet, the reception, the party, everything.
Let's just skip that insignificant little formality of "marriage" that comes in the middle of all those functions eh?

You're invited. All of you.

I will however dropkick the grandmother of the first person to ask me to pose for a smiling picture.

P.S. My mom was telling me all your cousins are getting married and i for one insane moment has the devil himself sitting on my tongue and i replied "What does that tell you mum".......awwwwwwww

Keeping The Faith....

2007-03-19T14:18:00.000+05:30

To say am disappointed would be an understatement, similar to every ardent Indian cricket fan...am shattered..heartbroken....

but everythings not lost....... many people come up to me and say "what happened now...India Lost...Bloody Losers etc etc..."

but nothing has changed from my prespective.....true it wasn't the best of days for Indian Cricket.... Yes, Indian Cricket is looking down the barrel.... on the verge of plunging itself into an Abyss........... Still...am all for the Indian Cricket Team... my support for the Men in Blue remains true and unconditional.

For all those doubters..... u can only criticize if u have the heart to Praise.... ITS EASY TO LOSE YOUR WORD...NOT AN EASY TASK TO "KEEP THE FAITH".

As the Greeks called upon Achilles to fight for them in the Trojan War. I call upon my Cricketing God to restore everybody's faith in Indian Cricket and save us from public Ignominy, and bring back the Glory days for Indian Cricket.

We don't want to see the genius... the artist... We want the Dasher.... The Cricketing beast within to reign supreme.

P.S. Come this Saturday, i believe my belief in Indian Cricket will not be shaken...... i believe the Sun will shine out the brighter... the sun will shine out the clearer... Hope still remains.

Feelingggg Good...

2007-03-10T22:53:00.000+05:30

So, moving on to brighter topics. The 10 simple pleasures of life.. Okay I am going to name 15 cuz I’m in a good mood, and I deserve to be happier than most. Hmm.. well, here goes :

1) Getting to sleep in late, tucked in a warm cozy quilt on an unexpected holiday, or just bunking first period sometimes.

2) Rain. Just getting wet. Playing cricket. Going on walks. In the rain.

3) Having a crush.

4) Favourite songs playing on the radio/on the tv/anywhere out of the blue.

5) Out of the blue compliments.

6) Catching up with old friends on long distance calls, or long, unplanned chats, or night outs..yeah baby - movies, heart to heart talks, looong night outs.

7) Long, hot showers.

8) Seeing your name in print.

9) Perfect weather, perfect company, long drives.

10) Unexpectedly feel good movies. Or watching reruns of your favourite feel good movies with your favourite company beside you.

11) Talking laaate into the night with the perfect somebody.

12) A warm hug. A kiss. From someone you love.

13) Awesome food.

14) Surprisingly good results/high attendance.

15) Sweet dreams.

When Zizou Head Butted the World Cup...!!

2007-03-07T17:57:00.000+05:30

Dear Zizou

The headlines were asking this everywhere, so I'll ask now.
Why?

I have a dirty habit. I often think up blog posts about an event before it actually happens; a head start, so to speak. While Shakira and Wycleff were up there on stage gyrating, I had it all planned out in my head.

There was a post about the beauty of sport, the glory of it. I'd thrown in a bit about emotions and something about sport as a panacea. My personal favorite part was the one about how this World Cup's been like a movie; Two embattled teams, one reeling under the allegations of match-fixing and the other marching back from a nightmare slump that saw them sink to the worst title defence in the history of the tournament, those two teams coming together, against all odds, to play this epic final game at the very place Hitler desecrated by his very presence and Jesse Owen consecrated by his.

Heck, I even threw in a rousing finale about those two teams standing there at the start, thousands of people in the stands, millions, no, billions of people across the world watching and how players managed not to be over-whelmed by the occasion.

And now here I am, writing this piece of emo tripe instead. So I'll ask again, not as an accuser, not as somebody demanding an explanation, but just as a guy bringing you a stiff drink and asking you if you want to talk about it.

Why man, why?

Before the final , a friend asked me who I was rooting for. You want to know who I was rooting for Z? Argentina. But hey, we all know what happened to them, so I said "You know what, I'm not really *rooting* for anyone because I like both teams so I'm just looking forward to a good game." "Nah" said my friend. "That's not how it works. Say I put a gun to your head and said you had to choose. Then what?" In that case, I said, France. I mean, Allez and all that right? You know why I said France?Because I figured if I had to choose, I may as well choose to see Zinadine Zidane's last hurrah.

And here we are now, at the end. You played a beautiful game man, you were good... you were fucking Disco.

And then, right before my eyes, my proposed post on the glory of sport turned into one about the folly of rage. To nick (and bastardize) what Steve Waugh told Herschelle Gibbs at the Cricket World Cup of 1999, "you just head-butted the world cup son."

How'd it feel? Did you hear a rib break? More importantly, did you hear the heartbreak? What a career you've had man, what a career. You're damn near peerless, if France wanted an Olympic gold medal at the 100 meters dash, all they have to do is enter your name in the event and put a ball in front of you at the starting line, you're just that sort of talisman.

I'll get the crucifixtion out of the way; I don't know whether you lost France the World Cup, I don't know how it would have gone down with you still in the game and I sure as hell don't think I've seen a stupider move in my life.

And now the friendly hug; you had a bad moment. Its ok, you'll live. Sure, you picked pretty much the worst time in the world to have that moment, but yeah, you had a moment. One of those where the brain goes into temporary shutdown, the emotion gets insane, and you did what you did. S'ok, we've all been there. Ok, so not THERE as in the Olympiastadium in Berlin at the World Cup final, but we've all had our meltdown moments.

I'm not going to lie to you. We're going to debate this one at coffee houses and bars, we're going to get drunk and call you the filthiest expletives, we're going to tear you to pieces. Just, you know, try not to take it personally.

Because you're still the man. Because for that one horrible moment, you've given us a billion beautiful ones. Because you're Zizou. I'm just sorry you blew your last hurrah. Now if only we could know why.

Yours sincerely.
Krishna.

P.S: Stripping away the consequences, ramifications and stupidity of the moment, I have to give you one thing. As a one on one, guy versus guy thing... that was pretty fucking badass. Get yourself a copy of the replay and check out the look on his face as he goes down. I hope you followed up with the French version of "How do you like THEM apples...bitch."

P.P.S: I also forgot to tell you, dear Z, that after France lost, a friend of mine who was supporting Italy made fun of me. I did the mature thing and head-butted the fucker in the chest. You got a red card for your efforts, I got a chilled Bacardi Breezer. (And, I think, a mild concussion)

Because I'm that bored.

2007-03-05T14:14:00.000+05:30

Because I'm *that* bored.

Name: KrishnaNickname(s): Mojo Jojo, KC,Krishy ,Chaitu,lambu, *insert favorite expletive*

Single or Taken? *grin*
Sex: Male.
Birthday: Dec 11th, every year.
Blood group: O +
Sign: Sagittarius. Or however the hell you spell it.
Siblings: 2 brothers
Hair color: Black
Eye color: Black\
Shoe size: 11/12. I donno, this shoe-size business is DAMN confusing.
What are you wearing right now? Black shirt, Blue jeans, Sneakers.
Where do you live? Hyderabad.
Have You Ever:-given anyone a bath? No.
bungee jumped? No.
broken the law? Mmm hmm.
made yourself throw-up? Yup!
gone skinny dipping? Nope
been in the opposite sex's bathroom? Nope
eaten a dog biscuit? No
put your tongue on a frozen pole? Yup
broken a bone? Yes
played truth or dare? Yes
been in a physical fight? Yes
been in a police car? Yup!
been on a plane? Yes
been in a hot tub? Yes
swam in the ocean? Nope
fallen asleep in college? What else did I pay the fees for?!
Cried when someone died? Yes.
Flashed someone? UMMMM!
Lied? Nope. Dammit, did it again.
Laughed so hard you fell off your chair? Yes.
Sat by the phone all night waiting for a call? Yes
Saved e-mails? Yes
wished you were someone else? Yes
wished you were a member of the opposite sex? Nope.
Been rejected? 'Course...
used someone? Ummmm
been cheated on? Hmmmm... dunno. Not that I know of.
Done something you regret? Yes.
First Thing That Comes to Mind:-
Yellow: Traffic lines
Blue: Water.
Happy: Money
Autumn: Leaves.
Cow: Cheese.

Have you ever had:-

chicken pox? Yes.
sore throat? Yes
cold? Yeah.
stitches? Yes.
bloody nose? No
sex? Unfortunately, NOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

Do you:-

believe in love at first sight? Ask myself that every time a pretty girl smiles at me. enjoy parks? Yeah.
like picnics? Yeah. l
ike school? Yeah.
hate anyone? Yeah.

Who:-

is the last person that called you? Vamshi.
makes you laugh the most? Ummmmm
can make you feel better no matter what? Hmmm, good question
was the last person you touched? Mum
you hugged? Mum.
you yelled at? I dooo *not* remember
told you they loved you? Mum.

Do You/Are You:-

like yourself? More often than not, yeah.
dye your hair? Nope.
have piercings below the waist? No. Just... Nooooo.
stolen anything over $50? If you mean RUPEES fifty then yes, if you mean $50, then no.
like ice cream? Chocolate Mousse Royale and Pink Bubble Gum at Baskins, Autumn Dreams at Melting Moments, Titanic at Soft Den, Lewinsky at Havmor.
Which is your favourite flavour? *points up*
like cold coffee? if somebody else pays for it, Love it.
Smoke? No.
have beer? *looks incredulous*
obsessive? Yeah.
Compulsive? Yes.
Depressed? Nope
suicidal? Never.

Random:-

Prized possession: Ummmmmmmmm....Ummmmmm
Last thing you said? "Bloody, book tickets for any god damn movie.
"What is beside you? A Computer, LOTS of papers, my cellphone and one empty chair. Yeah, I'm at Office.
Last thing you ate? Grapes & Bananas.
Are you right handed or lefty? Right
Favourite song: With or Without You, Nothing Else matters, River of Dreams.
Worst thing that has happened to you this year: Year’s just started Machan.

Time started: 3:10 pm.
Time finished: 4:00 pm.

Breaking News....

2007-01-25T10:40:00.000+05:30

Dear Editors of All Newspapers and Dear Producers At News Channels

I would like to congratulate you all on the impending nuptials of your children. I would also like to comment on how amazed I am that all your children seem to be named Abhishek or Aishwariya. They're your children, surely? BECAUSE IF THEY ARENT, I CANT SEE WHY THE FUCK YOU'RE PIMPING THEIR GODDAMED ENGAGEMENT IN YOUR PUBLICATIONS AND NEWSCASTS SO MUCH BECAUSE THE ONLY TIME I'D PIMP AN ENGAGEMENT THIS MUCH IS IF MY OWN KID WERE GETTING MARRIED!!

I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm very happy for Pooru and SunHairy. But my happiness started diminishing somewhere around the 99th "breaking news" story, you know, the one that went, "BREAKING NEWS: EXCLUSIVE: AISHWARIYA RAI HAS JUST MOVED A FACIAL MUSCLE."

Funny how she can never do that in a movie.

But to be fair to you guys, you haven't forgotten other issues of global importance; you know, stuff that could affect and effectively change the world as we know it... You guys haven't completely forgotten about the issues that REALLY matter.

Like, you know, Shilpa Shetty on Big Brother.

I mean, my GOD. That, that POOR celebrity, stuck there in that big, bad house that's watched by half the United Kingdom! That poor girl, I can't imagine the horror she must be going through; she must be crying herself to sleep every night with one single thought running through her head.

Why the *FUCK* didn't I do this EARLIER?!

Because you could put together every single movie she's ever done, from flipping Mai Khiladi Tu Anaadi to Dus, and they haven't gotten her the sort of mileage this thing has. Why be an international celeb when you can be an international incident instead? Heaven knows her nose is big enough to be an international incident in it's own right.

Special props to the newspaper that ran the headline screaming "SAVE SHILPA!!" I shit you not folks, for one horrible second, I thought Shilpa was a whale that got washed ashore on some beach in Brazil. And then I saw the picture of Shilpa Shetty alongside the story.

And realized it was actually a blue whale that got stuck in the Thames.

I get it, it's difficult to sell papers, it's hard to occupy 24 hours of airtime, so sometimes you've got to play this shit up. It's cool people. I get your dilemna. Don't worry, you could still get lucky.

I mean, maybe Aishwariya and Abhishek will honeymoon in the Big Brother house.

Lest Go Beyond...

2007-01-22T00:11:00.000+05:30

Lets go beyond.

Beyond the ordinary.

Ordinary convenient lives.

Lives - those that we take for granted.

'Grants' and 'approvals' - need to break free.

Free from convention.

Convention is justified only when broken.

Broken Toys, broken hearts, one of the same.

Same ol' streets, same ol' life, but a whole new perspective.

Perspective, another word for individuality.

Individuality, a superficial concept, defied by a few.

Few, the number of times i genuinely enjoy conversations.

Conversations, just don't go beyond cell phones and cars today.

Today, the day after yesterday.

Yesterday, trying to let go.

Go someplace where exists ultimate solitude.

Solitude, unachievable.

PS: ...

What Makes a Man....

2007-01-08T16:35:00.000+05:30

Over the weekend i have been wondering..... What Makes a Man....

is it his Looks... his Clothes....his Education...his Lineage....his Friends... ...

"I think its the Choices he Makes"...

Choices not in what he Chooses...But Choices in how he Decides to End It.

Drinks...On The House...

2007-01-03T11:11:00.000+05:30

Yeah, we're here, taking those chances, rolling those dice, fighting fights we'll lose, singing songs we'll butcher.

We're doing it because this is as young as we'll ever be, now is as loud as we'll ever laugh.

Here we are, before whatever and whoever happens to us, before the bets go off and hot hands cool, while the chips are still stacked ok.

Why do we do the stupid thing?

Because today it's ok to let the house win, because snake-eyes can't get you down.

And this is as young as we'll ever be.

Today the piper plays for free, drinks are on me.

And this is as young as we'll ever be

The Pigeon's Last Flight.

2007-01-02T18:45:00.000+05:30

He might be no Michael "Whispering Death" Holding

He might be no Malcom Marshall or a Dennis Lille

But by God can he Bowl...... The Best New Ball Bowler of his era..... the best i've seen till date... Role Model Material.

As he plays his last test at the SCG...i hope he bows out with a High.... a 5 for would be a fitting farewell to a man who showed the way many for many budding cricketers.

P.S: Warne's gone.... Mcgrath's out............ Ricky Ponting who is gonna step up to the Plate for U now....hahahahhahahahahahaha

Farewell Warney

2006-12-26T22:20:00.000+05:30

The Greatest Match Winner the world has ever seen….

The Man who inspired a Generation of young cricketers….

The Man who revived the dying art of Leg Spin bowling

Every Captains Dream…

We’ll never see him play Test Match Cricket again….

As the sun sets on arguably crickets most illustrious and probably the most controversial career there couldn’t have been a better farewell to someone who is Larger than Life, a man of Iconic Stature…

On the verge of the phenomenal feat of 700 Test Match wickets…at his beloved MCG.

Cricketer, Champion, Wizard, Icon, Role Model……IRREPLACABLE.

Take a Bow mate….There’ll never ever be another Shane K Warne.

Do we...

2006-11-21T11:22:00.000+05:30

I think Alcohol is an excuse

An excuse which a lot of people use to do the things they think they cant do otherwise and get away with it under the pretext of being too bloody drunk

Dont get me wrong

Alcohol is great :)

But do we really need it to be ourselves??

I Think...

2006-11-12T22:17:00.000+05:30

...

I think individuality is way underrated.

I think relationships are simply about relating to people. Not trying to understand, decipher, analyze and define them.

I think if any of us understood what love was, maybe we wouldnt have to talk about it so much.

I think we should stop trying to make things happen and just let things happen to us

I think its silly to plan, fully knowing that things will never turn out the way they were planned

I think excitement is just about not knowing whats going to happen next

I think human beings are slowly forgetting how to be human

I think make up was invented by ugly people- and lipstick doesnt make lips beautiful, it just reveals that theres something ugly underneath

I think we all know who exactly we are- but sometimes, pretending otherwise is more convenient

I think we can all do anything we want

I think marriage is a highly questionable institution

I think celebration should be a way of life- not restricted to occasions, not governed by reason

...

Krishna - -> Eco-Friendly

2006-05-24T00:40:00.000+05:30

Dear World...

I understand that sometimes you, as a full-flegdged living eco-system, need advice from time to time. That's cool. Really.

I understand that sometimes you feel the need to take it from me. I think thats mildly retarded and you're better off eating your own brains,but hey.

But there is a time and place for everything. And the morning ain't the time. While I'm in bed ain't the place.

Girlfriend ditched you?

Wait till afternoon.

Panicking about exams?

Call me at 6 p.m.

Got shot in the kidney?

You need a doctor, not an agony uncle.

I don't have a problem with offering you advice, even though any advice I offer is liable to compound whatever issue you may have. If your girlfriend broke up with you and you take my advice about what to do, it is quite possibly that your kid brother will die and George Bush will change the American constitution and get a third term as president.

But yet, sometimes, you see it fit to seek my advice. And thats cool. Really.

But after 9am. Really. Or I'll shoot you in the fucking kidney myself.

Twice.

In each one.

Lovingly yours.
Kittu

The Farewell Post....

2006-05-20T13:14:00.000+05:30

Really Big Farewell Post

Ok. So I lied. I could go on about avalanche of gossip and the ceaseless hugging and "stay in touch" farewell moments. But the truth is, on some level, this was no different from any other farewell any of you have ever been part of.

And this is a good thing. Because I can't think of a better way I would have liked to leave. So, thank you my friends, for friendships to last a lifetime. Thank you for always being my friends, and like I told one of them when I was talking to them, I'm depressed that we all are parting, but I can't think of a better bunch of friends/people whom i'd want holding fort for another 2 years.

Im going to shut my rambling, senti self up now.

In Other News:

There's also something to be said for acclimatizing them to the Indian way of speaking, and the problems that can result from a misunderstanding. For example

Desi: (after gigantic meal, hookah and cold coffee) Oh dude, I'm going to get sexy sleep tonight.

Phiranghi: (narrows eyes) Oye! You aren't getting no sexy sleep from me man!

Chicken fry...Fish fry...Bye Bye Bye

2006-05-15T11:25:00.000+05:30

sigh... i was attempting to read and then randomly this bappi da song popped into my head and it refuses to go away......

*scene mein* - Bappi da jiggling all his fat and his bling like there is no tomorrow and singing..........

You are my chicken fry......

You are my fish fry..

Kabhi na kehna kudiye bye bye bye.......

*more jiggling*

sigh....

Ho mo jo ko ro bo.....am bored

2006-05-02T01:59:00.000+05:30

So... I'm bored.

Which got me thinking... video game movies that will never get made:

Minesweeper: The Movie
'Click. Click. Click. BOOM'

The Solitaire Trilogy
'One man's quest to... arrange all the cards according to suit?'

In other news, I met a guy named Jango today. Never thought I'd meet a Jango outside the star wars universe. How bout that? So yeah, I met a Jango today. Bye.

Caress.......

2006-04-23T00:16:00.000+05:30

There’s the sunny corner on my bed, cool white cotton sheets draped lazily. I hold her by the waist and plant a kiss on her ear.

Laugh.

The fragrance of her lithe body suffuses with the fruity scent as i bury my face in her thick hair. Peppermint… i think. My bare warm chest against the cold skin of her bare back. Cheeks against one another.

Nuzzle. Caress. Whisper.

Love you, i murmur.

She smiles. She looks at me. Inky black staring knowingly.

Only the slight lilt of head and shining eyes acknowledge that she’s heard me.

I reach out and flick a stray strand from her face. Trace her facial contours with my fingertips. Upturned nose, softly rounded cheeks, thick lashes, arched eyebrows and mellifluous lips that hold a demure questioning glance that always makes me want to answer …not necessarily with words.

A Goddess.

For the Love of the Game....

2006-04-16T23:56:00.000+05:30

Football is just a game...im just a fan...i love supporting the players i like..i love the spirit...i love how it feels...but sometimes its more than a Game.....

For...!!!

2006-04-13T17:28:00.000+05:30

Thank you dear Lord,

for Love... families.... friends.... life.... for violins.... films.... books..... for fantasy.... myth..... legend..... for imagination.... discovery.... wonder..... for the glories, triumphs and woes of being a teenager.... for the selflessness of motherhood.... for genuine tears.... hearty laughs.... burning passions.... for sticking up for what you believe in.... for having the courage to simply believe.... for people being infuriatingly alive.... for dealing with loss.... for taking refuge in things that are bad for you.... for self indulgence.... for self control.... for routine.... for spontaneity.... for music that fills my ears as I walk the busy streets each morning.... for lazy afternoons.... for shopping trips.... dessert.... starlit nights.... cloudy days.... for that wonderful person/persons waiting for you as you get off the plane.... for beautiful sms's when you least expect them.... for walking on wet grass..... for education.... work.... for 15 minute snack breaks.... friday evenings.... for carrying on.... giving up.... failing.... surviving... rejoicing....for bravery.... fear.... releasing demons.... for hope.... mentors....... friendship.... for photographs.... memories.... dreams....

For everything that gives me the strength to get up each day and face the world in all its devastating magnificence....

Do u have wat it Takes....

2006-04-05T17:18:00.000+05:30

Had Written this down about 18 months ago, and i feel my legions of Fans are entitled to know the Darker side of ME.

Rejoice!

KC is looking for a girlfriend.

Do you have what it takes to be the object of his affection? Can you cook? How sweet is your ass?

What he's looking for:

- Nice ass.
- Nice sized tits.
- Pretty eyes, face, smile.
- An almost abs tummy.
- 5'6"
- Perpetually horny.
- Petite.

What he isn't looking for:

- Easy girls. -- He likes a challenge.
- Communists.
- Manly girls.
- This girl.

So, do you fit the bill? Do you have a friend that just might?

Contact me. Now.

I is for Inzamam.

2006-04-02T23:43:00.001+05:30

Third ODI.

Rameez: So Inzy, disappointed with your performance today?
Inzy: Bismilla-e-rehman-e-rahim. Thank you Allah. Ya the Indian batsman is play very good today. We is try very hard but is not win the game.

Rameez: Any words for Dhoni?
Inzy: Ya Dhoni is play very well. He is hit his shot very hard in our gaps. In start, we is protect our gaps very well. The grass is also thick but Dhoni is split our gaps with his bat.

Rameez: Another ordinary bowling performance?
Inzy: Ya our balls is loose. The bowler is went for many run. Asif is bowled well. Also, after some shots the ball is out of shape. Umpire is not give another ball. It is tough to play with one ball.

Rameez: Dropped catches, did that prove costly?
Inzy: Ya the ball is not stick to our hands. We is practice a lot sticking our bat in our hands. But now we is more practice sticking balls in our hands.

Rameez: Any plans for the next match?
Inzy: Ya India is on top but we is try to bounce on our back. Insha Allah we is play better.

Rameez: All the best Inzy.
Inzy: Thank is you.

Copy paste, you never fail to amaze me.

The Barons of Beer!

2006-04-01T23:52:00.000+05:30

Reports that several members of a notorious terrorist group are headed to Bangalore have the city on edge.DJ Kallu, RJ Dost,and several others, all key operatives of the terrorist outfit "The Barons of Beer" are expected to arrive in Bangalore come this April. Unconfirmed reports also suggest that they may be joined by several others, also nefarious member's of this group.

Security has been tightened at all pubs and bars. "They've ordered an extra nine hundred crates of Beer", a bar owner who wished to remain anonymous was quoted as saying. Parents-groups are holding protest marches and demonstrations outside Police Headquarters, worried about the safety of their daughters. "Yes, I have sent my daughter away to Paupa New Guinea for safety and I'm not ashamed to say it" said one concerned parent.

When asked, Chief Minister J. Joyouslolita agreed "this is the scariest thing we've heard since Mandy Moore, but we are doing all we can to cope with the situation." The Barons are notorious for attacks on bars in Hyderabad. At least 600 bottles of beer were killed in each attack. However, this is the first time they have targeted Bangalore.

S.K.Chaitanya

BBC News
Hyderabad

Two Years - The past n the Present.

2006-03-25T16:47:00.000+05:30

MBA - The 2 years that flew by with the blink of an eye

Met the most amazing and the most revolting people...

Experienced euphoria and bliss along with pain and agony....

Saw the most delightful things and the most heartwrenching things...

Did the most wacky and the most mundane things......

Experienced every possible human emotion........

Saw the pinnacle of success and the depth of despair...

Flew high with joy and then crashed and burned......

Saw beauty of the most exquisite kind and tried to erase memories of nauseating ugliness......

Extracted things from the very core of my soul and also acted like a... well.

Ate like a mad mo fo and have the tales to tell ....

Fell in and out romances, surviving to tell the tale.....

Earned the trust of many...betrayed the faith of a few....

Formed friendships for a lifetime....lost many valued individuals along the way....

Lost myself along the way...... found some missing pieces here and there...

Survived the great wars albeit with many permanent scars......

And I'll miss every last one of em...

sigh....i ll miss this life..... i ll miss so many things that i cannot describe.... but in a way i am happy too, for it is time to move on.

Dear Powers-That-Be... have a heart... please please PLEASE keep me in touch with the friends I've made.

Nutzzzzz....

2006-03-17T17:41:00.000+05:30

So, anyway. exams,research project etc Done and Dusted, and this gives people like me the perfect excuse to contemplate the sort of things that people like me are prone to contemplating.

So. Shakira.

Whats up with her?

You remember that song of hers, "Wherever Whenever"? I do, sadly enough.

So... there were these lines in there. "Lucky that my breasts are small and humble, so you dont confuse them with big mountains."

Now.

"Small" I get.

But what in tit's name is "humble"? How can her breasts be *humble*?

Like what, do they get down and touch your feet every time you enter the room?!

*Shakes head*.

Popstars are mad.

The Game....

2006-03-05T21:48:00.000+05:30

Every random dude seems to be tagging another random dude....so, being the ONE its on me to tag a few people too...so here goes

Rules of the Game:
1. The tagged victim must come up with 9 different points of their perfect lover.
2. Need to mention gender of target.
3. Tag 3 victims to join this game and leave a comment saying they've been tagged.
4. If tagged again, there's no need to post a 2nd time. (OHH!! YAAYYY!)

(1)She should be a she. That would be nice. And vaguely endearing.

(2)She's got to *get* the joke. If she sits there re-enacting I Am Sam when everybody else is cracking up, not on.

(3)She's got to have the sort of haircut that suits her and the sort of hair I can run my fingers through. Hair. Turn-on of the century.

(4)She's got to be adventurous when it comes to sex, and willing to take control. Surprise me, I'm yours. Unless you're a guy.

(5)She's GOT to be able to power a conversation past "Wuzzap?" "NM".

(6)She's gotta be a good Kisser.

(7)She can't say "Yeah I *lurrrveee* Archie comics!" in response to the question "So do you like to read.

(8)Belly Button, oh yeah-Should have a good 'One'....Latest sexual fantasy.

(9)Should n Must be Good at Cooking.Period.

(10) (Ok I know 10 is cheating BUT) Space, must. have. own. space.

Dogs Vs Humans (The Sequel).... The Humaniod Strikes Back!!!

2006-02-25T20:24:00.000+05:30

...A dog will stay stupid. That's why we love them so much. The entire time we know them, they're idiots. Think of your dog.Everytime you come home , he thinks it's amazing. He has no idea how you accomplish this every day. You walk in the door, the joy of this experience overwhelms him. He looks at you, HE'S BACK, IT'S THAT GUY, THAT SAME GUY. He can't believe it. Everything is amazing to your dog. ANOTHER CAN OF FOOD? I DON'T BELIEVE IT.

Dogs want to be people. That's what their lives are about. They don't like being a dog. They're with people all the time, they want to graduate. A dog would sit there all day, he would watch his/her master walk by, he would think to himself, I COULD DO THAT! HE'S NOT THAT GOOD.

That's why the greatest, most exciting moment in the life of a dog is the front seat of your car. You and him in the front seat. It's the only place where your head and his are on the exact same level.He sits up there, he thinks, THIS IS MORE LIKE IT. YOU AND ME TOGETHER, THIS IS THE WAY IT SHOULD BE. He looks out the front. What's he looking at? He's a dog. WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO MAKE - A
RIGHT OR A LEFT? I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE I AM.

They have a hard time. They stand up, they sit down, they can'thandle the turn either way. No matter which way you turn, he's not ready. They don't know what to do. And then comes the great moment of frustration. You stop someplace and get something to eat. This kills him. You get a Burger, this blows his mind. INSTANT FOOD WHENEVER YOU WANT IT? You know what this means to him? You ever see the look on his face? He looks over at you. HOW'D YOU GET THAT? ARE THEY GIVING IT TO EVERYBODY NOW? YOU THINK I COULD GET ONE? They can't get anything.

Dogs have no money. Isn't that amazing? They're broke their entire
lives. But they get through. You know why dogs have no money?

No pockets.

I've Met, Therefore...

2006-02-19T19:30:00.000+05:30

I guess when i first started this blog, which by the sorry number of entries reminds me was not very long ago I thought, rather selfishly, that I would keep other people out of it.I now realize that my very self is composed of parts of the various people I've met and the ways in which I've reacted to them.I'd rather like to amend a slogan from one of philosophy's poster boys,"I think, therefore I am",to 'I've met, therefore I am'.

Everyone is defined forever in a single instant of their lives, a moment in which a man encounters his self for always

- Borges

somebody gift me this....

2006-02-11T23:22:00.000+05:30

Oh yeah....Finally!!!

The Great Indian Tamasha...!!!

2006-01-29T00:33:00.000+05:30

Gone-Soon (we hope) Wedding
Its wedding season in India and I'm Gulti.

*waits for laughter to die down*

I don't understand The Great Indian Wedding (TM). Come to think of it, I don't understand marriage at all. But since this is the season of The Great Indian Wedding, I'll stick to ranting about The Great Indian Wedding.

Weddings are supposed to be ceremonies and occasions where two people celebrate their love and union.

What absolute bullshit romanticist baap.

A wedding is an occasion used to "celebrate" a date that one out of the two people involved will try to forget for every single year of their married life. It is also an occasion to celebrate the date that one partner will forget ever year, leading the other partner to not give the first partner Sex.

The wedding is an occasion to "celebrate" one's bondage to another person for life. To celebrate this occasion, first, the two people in question walk around a fire until seven rounds are complete, or they get dizzy, whichever comes first. Other people wear suits that were made six years ago and feel a bit tight around the armpits, and watch them take these rounds. Then, to celebrate further, they fling coloured rice at the couple. If you're lucky, one bit gets the bride in the eye and she bleeds to death.

If you're unlucky, she just bleeds and lives and the ceremony is stretched further.

Then, to celebrate further, the couple stands on a stage for roughly 321423234 hours with a "Look Batman, I am The Joker" smile stuck on their face, while they shake hands with half the population of Guatemala, whom they have never seen before and will never see again.

Then these people eat free food and go home to bitch about how crap the food was. Twats.

Me? I'm practical. I've told my parents straight off; Gulti or no gulti, I'm not getting married. Why on earth would I put a woman through the torture of being married to me?! I've told em they can have the mehendi, the sangeet, the reception, the party, everything.

Let's just skip that insignificant little formality of "marriage" that comes in the middle of all those functions eh?

You're invited. All of you.

I will however dropkick the grandmother of the first person to ask me to pose for a smiling picture.

i have been Tagged....

2006-01-22T23:44:00.000+05:30

Well well.....i have been finally tagged..Yipeeeee *Hu pa pa Huppa Huppa....Hu Pa Pa huppa huppa* (old jungle dance)

**Harshie has tagged me..... and well now i havta mention 8 things about my ideal match... so here goes

The R.U.L.E.S

1. The tagged victim has to come up with 8 different points of how they would want their ideal match to be.
2. Need to mention the sex of the target.
3. Tag 8 victims to join this game & leave a comment on their comments saying they’ve been tagged.
4. If tagged for a 2nd time, there’s no need to post again

Herez for all U Potential suitors :

1) Shez gotta be able to Cook.period

2)Shez gotta be Good Looking.

3)Patience should be a virtue that she must posses truck loads full of.

4)She should be capable of intelligent conversations

5)she should Dress for the occasion......stylish

6)She should be good enuf to take care of Me.

7)she should have opinions of her own

8)She should be Humble...

My turn to Tag.....

Rajkiran has been tagged.

Strength....................

2006-01-03T19:59:00.000+05:30

so, what is strength?

i'm intrigued...

isnt strength standing up for something you belive in, no matter how ridiculous people think it is?

isnt strength not telling the person you love, you love them, merely because they cant reciprocate the same?

isnt strength not shattering when people mock the work you do, that you truly believe in?

isnt strength choosing the 'girl-next-door' best friend over the hottie girl from college?

isnt strength building your own dreams and living them true?

isnt unconditional love strength?

isnt strength having the patience to wait for your one true soulmate?

isnt strength keeping your friends through ups and downs, especially through the downs?

i'm confused....

Mangalyam Thanthuna Navajeevana....

2005-12-21T15:29:00.000+05:30

I'm anti-marriage and I'm not going to get married (yes, I can almost HEAR the women breathing a sigh of relief), but just for kicks I sat down and wondered what a REAL marriage proposal should be... none of that "Make me the happiest man in the world" shit... if you want to make someone the happiest man in the world, dont marry him, buy him a Playstation... mod-chip included of course. But I figure a real marriage proposal should be honest you know... something like:

I love you. I love you more than anyone or anything I've ever loved before. That doesn't mean we'll always be happy... we won't. We'll fight and we'll say things that will hurt, and I mean REALLY hurt, things that we won't just be able to apologize for and take back. But it means more to me that in spite of that we'll be able to make a go of it. There will be days when you'll wish you'd never met me and days where I'll wish I'd never met you, but for every one of those, there'll be a hundred when I'll wonder what I would have done if I hadn't met you. I'm not perfect and I never will be. And no, you won't "complete" me and no, I won't complete you. We'll never be complete, but we won't need to be. We'll be happy instead. We'll learn little things about each other, like how I can't go to bed without checking to see if every single water heater in the house is off. And we'll have our own inside jokes and when someone says something we'll catch each other's eye and grin like conspirators because we know something they don't. Some days we'll be each other's greatest strength, other days we'll be each other's greatest weakness. But we'll be each other's. A day will come, sooner rather than later, when we're done discovering each other and there won't be any novelty value anymore. But I'll take your hand and we'll go off, together, and discover something else, something as wonderous. I don't know if I'll always be there, I don't know that I'll always put the seat down and I don't know if I'll ever stop and ask for directions. But I do know that if I don't ask you to marry me right now, I will regret it and hate myself for the rest of my life... Will you marry me?

(Now you know why I'm never getting married)

Ban'em...Burn'em...

2005-12-09T17:42:00.000+05:30

You know whats weird?

Girls wearing T shirts with slogans and stuff on em.

I mean, there's just no winning. When you wear a t shirt with a slogan or catchphrase on it, the natural reaction of all around you is to read the damned thing. With guys, its no big deal... just look at it, and read.

But chicks. If you dont read the slogan they're all "You dont like my t shirt"

And of course, I never read the damned things because any attempt to read them looks like you're ogling a woman's umm, bust.

So if you try to read em, you catch women giving you a dirty look. If you dont read em, you still get dirty looks.

Its like being stuck between a rock and a hard place, the devil and the deep blue sea, Britney Spears and Jessica Simpson, Karela and Baingan!

Women should wear solid coloured t shirts, no writing allowed. Or it should be on the back, like on football jerseys.

*shakes head*

About Love and being Loved....

2005-11-30T14:48:00.000+05:30

Its really amazing how three seemingly simple words can bring about a whirlwind of change in your being. They can alter your perspective on life, your opinions and beliefs about yourself and others. They can arouse in you genuine joy and gratitude. Or maybe not! What I state above are my personal reactions.

We should feel wonderful when someone says to You, "I love you!" You'll wanna dance and sing and laugh and cry all at once. We might feel like if U leapt out of the window right then, U'd surely be able to fly. We appreciate it when Our family says it to us everyday, that's for sure, but its a different experience altogether, an incomparable thrill when you're given that kind of pedestal from someone who isn't obliged to. They love you because they want to, not because they have to or are supposed to. Choice rather than complusion turns it into an ornate delicacy. Its a delight to realize that your existence is of, at least, some significance to another human - that you've touched the soul of someone and they've in turn tried to touch yours. The liberating intimacy of it is rather spectacular.

I had a friend who always told me that you should never hesistate in telling someone that you love them. In an age where human emotions seems primitive and the world is dominated by angst, egocentricity and desperate quests for pleasure, the most pristine gift you can offer someone is your love. Gems and shining metal lose their sheen before it! Just never defile its sanctity with simulation.

I wish I could somehow open up people to expression. It is strangely gratifying, trust me. If you appreciate someone, go upto them and tell them. Tell them how much you love them and what all you love about them. Worst case scenario, you'll lose nothing but they'll always gain infinitely. Voyeurism isn't happening at all...don't creep out people but honesty is wonderful.

Ah well! I have gotten all didactic again. Pardon my infirmity. I'm in a good mood.

Keep your sun shinin' alwayz

Me the Mahatma....

2005-11-22T22:50:00.000+05:30

Since my last post, many have questioned the validity of my claims of being The One. Some people have questioned me openly and rather condescendingly and this angers me, partly because its a pain spelling the word "condescendingly".

I have been asked what my 'job profile' as savior of the universe is... Heathen mortals do not understand that one is the savior of the universe BECAUSE there is no job profile and One can tackle anything, ANYTHING that is a threat to the universe... be it a nuclear bomb or someone who cheats at Uno.

But, since you question me, question my sacrifice, my... singularity... i shall now list some of my functions:

Encourage the world to point and laugh at those who say "Channel Wee" instead of Channel V like they're supposed to.

Protect the universe from all who seek to destory it using negotiations, violence or, in extreme cases, refried beans.

Weed out chicky pop singers and kill them in their cribs. I will hear no complaints about the existence of Britney Spears or Jessica Simpson. You shoulda seen the ones we killed! Those two are harmless in comparison.

Ensure that balance in the universe is maintained. This means that I must keep a close watch to see that it never runs out of Cappuchino ice cream, olives, pizza's and Tom and Jerry cartoons.

To kill all those who say things like "Ooohhh I love reading!" What do you read? "Ooohhh Archie Comics!

To search for ways to make spelling words like "condescending" easier.

To make sure that there's never ever a flood of beer that will wash people away. I do this, difficult as it is, by encouraging junta to drink as much beer as possible.(and if the situation demands...guzzles down rivers of beer myself)

Now. Do not question my sacrifice and singledom again. I'll slay the lot of you!

The One....The Only....

2005-11-17T21:50:00.000+05:30

I finally figured out why I'm single.

I had an "epiphany". A moment of clarity, and I realized why I'm perpetually single...

The universe needs me.

Its like this. I cannot have a girlfriend or significant other because the universe needs me. Im here for a reason, I'm The One or something like that. I will, in my lifetime, go on to become the saviour of the universe as we know it.

Which is why i cannot date or be distracted by other such frivolties. Thus, the universe goes out of its way to clear my path of all distractions. It sends me to a MBA college where the women shave more than I do. When I thwart that, it makes all the interesting women leave town. It also ensures that the ones that are still in town find other guys and get hooked up BEFORE i meet them.

Thats because I'm The One. I can't date because I would just wreck any girl's life. I'd have to leave her and go off and save the universe and probably die in the bargain... so the universe is keeping me honest and focused. Its making sure that when the day comes, I have no attachments that will make me want to shirk my responsibility.

So yeah, be nice to me. I'm doing this for you, all of you in the universe. To save YOUR hides.

So yeah, thats why I'm always single. Thats my theory.

Its VERY scientific.

And a lot easier than believing that maybe im single just because I'm pathetic.

2005-11-15T23:30:00.000+05:30

Career Inventory Test Results

Extroversion	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	60%
Emotional Stability	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	50%
Orderliness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	43%
Altruism	\|\|\|	10%
Inquisitiveness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	56%

You are an Inventor, possible professions include - systems designer, venture capitalist, actor, journalist, investment broker, real estate agent, real estate developer, strategic planner, political manager, politician, special projects developer, literary agent, restaurant/bar owner, technical trainer, diversity manager, art director, personnel systems developer, computer analyst, logistics consultant, outplacement consultant, advertising creative director, radio/TV talk show host.

Take Free Career Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

My Mom....and My Mess...!!!

2005-11-10T19:21:00.000+05:30

I hate it when someone cleans my room. This is because I do not believe that my room is in a mess. I honestly believe that the idea of the "mess" as we know it, is incorrect. A mess is something that hampers productivity or obstructs the goal that you are working towards.

Thus, my room is NOT a mess. It is merely "a collection of asymetrical, randomly arranged clusters of assorted objects, wherein the place of each object is duly known to the user i.e. me"

The fact that there is paper scattered all over my room does not hamper my productivity; I know exactly what papers are in what stack and can even guess as to where in the stack they are. When someone piles all the paper up into one single bunch, now THATS a mess right there because suddenly my productivity has been hampered.

Besides, what is this loathing for asymmetry? Someone went and judged that only things arranged perpendicular or parallel to one another are "organized" and anything arranged assymetrically, without any seeming order, is a mess. I beg to differ. My clusters might be asymetrical but I know how they work. There is a method to the madness. What law states that order and organization are denoted only by rigid, perfectly arranged piles of paper?

I'll have you know I object.

Business Ideas...any takers!!!

2005-11-04T22:26:00.000+05:30

The placement season at my college is on at full swing. Seeing as how they're poised to go, I've been exploring potential post-MBA career options. I present before you, for debate and discussion, my shortlist.

1. Gigolo.

Keep running the treadmill, work out harder, buff up plenty, fallover "accidentally" and hurt self so bad that i need facial reconstruction, thus get self a nicer mug than the current one. Then pimp self at assorted street corners. In fact, if any women are gullible enough right now even, feel free to get in touch.

2. Pav Bhaji Stall.

Open a pav bhaji stall outside secunderabad railway station (maybe Necklace road even...). Offer special "sympathy discount" to MBA students. I'm currently looking for a business partner for this venture because every pav bhaji stall needs a cold drink vendor alongside. Tenders are now open.

3. Chappal Maker.

Buy myself a pair of Osho chappals, study how they're made, make minor modifications and sell em as MoJo JoJo chappals.

4. Tree Hugger.

Enough said.

5. Self Styled Guruji.

I'll become like that hugging amma who goes around hugging people and building a multi-crore empire out of it. I'll be Guru (to be pronounced gooroo in the psuedo Amreekan way) MoJo JoJo, of the cult of Mojoism. Our chant is Carpe Chaddiem. Followers, preferably female, hot, nubile and single, are welcome.

6. Blog Comments Consultant

Open a consultancy firm which advises bloggers on strategic plans for getting maximum Comments out of their posts... without being chicks.

7. Yahoo Msgr Night-watchman.

Heaven knows im online 24/7. May as well make it official and guard the place while I'm at it.

The Truth......as i c it

2005-10-20T16:49:00.000+05:30

ME TOO........ ME TOO...........

Jai Sri Ram....

2005-10-13T23:10:00.000+05:30

QUESTION: WHY IS HANUMAN THE GREATEST SUPERHERO CHARACTER OF THEM ALL.
( WELL AS THERE IS A MATHEMATICAL EXPLANATION FOR EVERTHING,WE TRY AND PROVE THIS BY USING THE THEORY OF SIMILARITY )

1) HE INVENTED THE FUNNY SUPERHERO DRESS CODE.

2) SUPERMAN CAN FLY AND FREEZ THE ENTIRE LAKE--SOO FORGET ABOUT FREEZING A LAKE, DAM....HANUMAN CAN TRANSPORT AN ENTIRE LAKE.

3) HE-MAN USES THE POWER OF "CASTLE GREY SKULL", HE DOSENT NEED ANY "SKULL" FOR HIS POWERS.

4) LIKE CAPTIAN PLANET ; HANUMAN TRIES TO MAINTAIN HARMONY BY ELIMINATING THE EVIL AND PROTECTING "GAYA", HE JUST DOSENT USE THE CALL LINE....... "GO PLANET"

5)) CAN JUMP FROM 1 BUILDING TO ANOTHER AND DOSENT EVEN NEED A WEB TO DO THAT........"MAY BE THIS IS HIS GIFT , HIS CURSE"

6) HAS A TAIL LIKE HELL BOY, WHICH IS BY THE WAY FIREPROOF TOO , I READ SOMEWHERE HE USED IT TO BURN A CITY.

7) CAN CHANGE HIS SIZE..OPPS I MEAN HEIGHT.. ,GROW TALL AND SHORT AT HIS CONVINENCE JUST LIKE THAT.

8) HE EATS BAD GUYS FOR BREAKFAST
AND HE EXISTED MUCH BEFORE ANY OTHER SUPERHERO WAS BORN.

(THUS FROM THE ABOVE REASON ,WE CAN SAY THAT HANUMAN IS THE GREATEST SUPERHERO OF THEM ALL)

[ this is what i come up with when the crazy part of me comes alive and decides to express its weired sense of humour]

Random Thoughts in my Cognizant Existence...!!!

2005-10-03T19:19:00.000+05:30

Of all the things people choose to believe in, the soul mate analogy is among the most misunderstood. Undoubtedly, you can find your soul mate anywhere, anytime, at any age. Often people go lifetimes, without really finding their soul mate, without really knowing that they have.As it holds true with all discoveries, you have to be truly naïve to discover your soul mate. And a soul mate is not necessarily what popular belief makes it out to be. Your soul mate need not be your marriage partner. Your soul mate need not even be someone of the opposite sex. Also, people tend to believe a soul mate stems from similarity. Truly there is joy in finding someone who is just like you, thinks just like you. But, think about it. If you were with you, would your similar souls connect? Surely you’d be at ease, there would be immense joy, immense beauty, immense understanding. But wouldn’t there be greater joy when two opposing souls connect? Think about it. I’m not saying your soul mate doesn’t essentially come from the same school of thought. But if there were no conflicting behavioral patterns, would you truly grow as people, in each other’s company. Would you nurture each other forever? If you stare into a mirror, everyday, for a hundred years, you eventually see no flaws. When you stare into a talking mirror, however, you learn so much about yourself. A soul mate is a talking mirror. So different, yet essentially the same. Someone who’ll pick you up when you fall…merely because he’ll know you fell. And not look at you with the biased eyes he looks at himself. Instant connection is essential. But more often than not, the connection goes unnoticed. More likely, you are not ready for it...

Truly blessed, are the people who discover their soul mate. Not the ones who think they have or the ones who pretend to. But those who truly do…

Your Good Name plz.....

2005-08-27T22:21:00.000+05:30

What's in a name?

No fuck Shakespeare... really... what IS in a name?

I mean, what's with people going "my name" and going all proprietry on it.

Your name isn't really YOUR name now is it? It is a word used to generally denote you and differentiate you from that other guy who has hair growing out of his ear who just happens to be standing next to you, yeah. But that's about it.

Umm what? You ARE the guy with the hair growing out of his ears?

Don't distract me, I had a point. Names, yes. Your name isn't YOURS. Look at it logically...

Did YOU pick it? Well did you?

No. Mummy and Daddy and the entire extended family (we're Indian[Gulti to be more specific], of course they were in on it!) sat there, made all sorts of horrifying cutesy faces at you and suddenly plonked a name of their choosing down on you.

Which is explains how some people are called "Gregory". Or Shakespeare for that matter.

Anyway, my point is, it isn't YOUR name. That's the conclusion I've reached based on a 22 year study I've conducted. It's just a word that apparently belongs to EVERYBODY and you're just really given the privilege of using it.

Others, of course get the privilege of abusing it, often resulting in unsightly, ghastly rape.

Thus people give you nicknames. It doesn't matter that your ACTUAL name has all of 1.34567 syllables. No, we must prove closeness to each other by bastardizing your name. We shall call you all sorts of names but the one that was originally thrown at you when you were born.

On occasion, they replace this name by an entirely different one! Some favorites across the world:

"Hey faggot"

"Idiot"

"Chut"

"Hey kid"

And what's up with parents giving their children names that must be a minimum of fourteen syllables: Like kids called "Akashdeep"

Everyone in the world except the tax collector and your headmaster is going to call you bloody Akash, so why did they bother with the deep? Can you imagine how unbelievably left out Deep feels?

And then those parents who want their kids to grow up tough. So they give them names that ensure that the child will be beaten to within an inch of its life every single day during the lunch break at school.

Phinnaeus Walter.

(You can just imagine the poor rascal getting wedgies in every single lunch break)

Apple Blyth.

(She should marry Phinnaeus, that way when they go to a restaurant and she says "Apple Phinnaeus" the waiter can say "Sorry ma'am but we don't serve that drink")

Sigh.

Straight from the Heart....

2005-08-12T18:59:00.000+05:30

Letters to God from little ones...

Dear God... Instead of letting people die and having to make new ones, why don't you just keep the ones you have now?

Dear God... Who draws the lines around the countries?

Dear God... I went to this wedding and they kissed right in church. Is that okay?

Dear God... Thank you for my baby brother, but what I prayed for was a puppy.

Dear God... It rained for our whole vacation and is my father mad! He said some things about you that people are not supposed to say, but hope you will not hurt him anyway.

Dear God... Please send me a pony. I never asked for anything before. You can look it up.

Dear God... If we come back as something, please don't let me be Jennifer because I hate her.

Dear God... I want to be just like my daddy when I get big, but not with so much hair all over.

Dear God... I think about you sometimes, even when I'm not praying.

Dear God... I bet it is very hard for you to love all the people in the world. There are only four people in our family and I can never do it.

Dear God... Of all the people who worked for you, I like Noah and David the best.

Dear God... If you watch me in church Sunday, I'll show you my new shoes.

Dear God... I do not think anybody could be a better God. Well, I just want you to know that I am not just saying this because you are God already.

Dear God... I didn't think orange went with purple until I saw the sunset you made on Tuesday. That was cool!

I was like tht long long time ago...i bet u all were the same too...ahhhhhh childhood...

Whoz ur Daddyyy...!!!

2005-07-26T15:32:00.000+05:30

Over the last few months, perhaps years even, I have been asked one single question by many different people... The non-stop recurrence of this question left me wondering about it's nature. Either it is a question of earth-shattering and possibly world-altering significance that I have completely missed the boat on, like that other question, "Who moved my cheese?" to which the answer of course is "You're a twat". Or it is some sort of new cultural fad, an incorporation into the lingo of the young and clued-in of this generation, the last generation and possibly many generations to come, if the diverse age group of people asking me this question is to be taken as evidence. The question in question is deceptively simple:

Who's your Daddy?

When I politely told the first person who asked me this my father's name, he seemed amused and openly dismissive of my answer. I was further puzzled when he told me that Iron Maiden was, in fact, my daddy.

It was then that I realized that being a father has nothing to do with lending seed to the creation of a being. A person and now even an object can be my daddy merely because it is "cool". Thus, something is your daddy if it extends a powerful authority over you. I realize that I missed this concept and question entirely simply because my REAL daddy is the world's most chilled out person and has never felt the need to stand with his foot on my neck and exercise authority so to speak.

Thus, anyway, because I am seized by the urge to now contribute to the cultural lexicon of my generation, I must look inwards and ask myself this all-important question.

WHO oh who, is your Daddy?

The answers are many. Take what you will... and add to them if you wish.

Douglas Adams is your daddy.

South Park is your daddy.

Movies are your daddy.

The underground servers at IIT are your daddy.

Stephen King is your daddy.

Paneer rolls at roll call are your daddy.

Beer is your daddy.

The iPod is your daddy.

Adam Gilchrist is your daddy.

Arthur C Clarke is your daddy.

Michael Jordan is your daddy.

30 minutes of solid jogging is your daddy.

Love is your daddy.

Gooey chocolate cake is your daddy.

A Film magazine is your daddy.

Blog’in is your daddy.

Orkut is your daddy.

"Bhutta" on Tankbund in the rains is your daddy.

Lightsabers are your daddy.

Hyderabadi biryani is your daddy.

Blogging at 1 a.m is your daddy.

Rajnikanth is your daddy.

The Almost Famous OST is your daddy.

Jackie Chan is your daddy.

Maggie Cheung is your daddy.

Soooo... who's your Daddy?

The path of Karma....

2005-07-21T21:37:00.000+05:30

Even as a man casts off worn-out clothes and puts on others which are fresh, so the atma casts off bodies and enters into others which are new.
Bodies are born, and what is born must die.
But the eternal atma is never born. It never dies. Weapons cannot cut it, fire cannot burn it, water cannot wet it and wind cannot dry it.
This atma is not your perishable body. It is your immortal self, the imperishable self of everyone, once that is known, then what is there to grieve for?
The wise never grieve... neither for the dead nor for the living.
I am that Atma.
I am the supreme Lord of all, residing in the heart of every being. I am the father of this world and also its mother and sustainer.
I am the beginning, the middle and the end. Everything is produced out of me. Everything is pervaded by me. No creature can exist without me.
Whatever path men travel, it is my path.
Whichever way they go they reach me.

Krsna, Keynote Speaker @ The Mahabharata War Room

Special Thanks to Arjuna for inspiring this Project

conditional LOVE...

2005-07-11T23:16:00.000+05:30

Yesterday, i was having this conversation with a friend of mine. He was "worrying" about my "future" as usual. He kept asking me how long I intended on going on like this? He asks me every other day, "Are you over her yet?" I wish i could permanently etch in his mind - "I CANNOT get over her." Nor do i want to. She makes me happy.
This conversation however, led me to ponder upon some strange conditions people lay down before they "fall" in love.

I'll love you if you love me back.

I'll love you if you go out with me.

I'll love if you are thin.

I'll love you if you do things my way.

I'll love you if you buy me a bigger n better gifts for my every birthday!

I'll love you as long as nobody else loves me more than you.

I'll love you until i find someone better!

I am sure I could go on for really long, but i would rather refrain from such indulgence. I see it so often these days and every time it just saddens me further. I really don't mean to force my opinions upon any other person but i wish people would see the essence of this sanctity. And even if they have no desire to, i really do wish they'd stop forcing their worldly wisdom on me. At the end of your life, if you've lived in so much shallowness you'll die with regrets! You'll repent because you never really lived! You never lived for yourself! Always for "the world" and its various farces!

I am happy because I live the only way i think is right!

I am happy because I am proud of possessing something most people are too unfortunate to even realize!

I am happy because I have loved and have been loved!

I am an obstinate, unrelenting, "blind" believer, if you will! Don't ever try to waver my convictions. You'll just be disappointed.

Buzzer round...hands on the buzzer...

2005-07-06T22:38:00.000+05:30

10 most stupid questions people usually ask in obvious situations and some equally stupid

answers:-

>1. At the movies:
>When you meet acquaintances/friends
>Stupid Question:- Hey, what are you doing here?
>Answer:-Well,it's so hot , there were no cool cabs so I thought i'd watch some advertisements in the cool comfort of the theatre.

>2. In the bus:
>A fat girl wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet
>Stupid Question:-Sorry, did that hurt?
>Answer:-No, not at all, I'm on local anesthesia..... why don't you try again or should i try this time.

>3. At a funeral:
>One of the teary-eyed people ask
>Stupid Question:-Why, why him, of all people.
>Answer:-Why?Would it rather have been you?

>4. At a restaurant:
>When you ask the waiter
>Stupid Question:-Is the "blah blah blah" dish good
>Answer:-No, its teribble and made of adulterated cement.We occasionaly also spit in it.

>5. At a family get-together.When some distant aunt meets you after years
>Stupid Question:-Munna,kittu, you've become so big.
>Answer:-Well you haven't particularly shrunk yourself.

>6. When a friend announces his wedding, and you ask
>Stupid Question:-Is the gal you're marrying good?
>Answer:-No,she's miserable,nagging, insensitive lout...it's just the....u know what...!!!.

>7. When you get woken up at midnight by a phone call
>Stupid Question:-Sorry. were you sleeping.
>Answer:-No. I was playing cricket for India at Sharjah and just when you called Salim Malik was betting with me that Pakistan would win. What do you think?

>8. When you see a friend/colleague with evidently shorter hair
>Stupid Question:-Hey have you had a haircut?
>Answer:-No, its autumn and I'm shedding......

>9. At the dentist when he's sticking pointed objects in your mouth
>Stupid Question:-Tell me if it hurts?
Answer:-And while I'm telling you , you tell me if I bite.

>10. You are smoking a cigarette and a cute woman asks
>Stupid Question:-Oh, so you smoke
>Answer:-No, it's a miracle ...........it was a chalk and not flames

VAMUSHKA.... Yamma Yamma...

2005-06-25T18:55:00.000+05:30

It was bad enough when it was a fact Shah Rukh Khan can't act worth a damn.

Now it seems the fucker can't speak straight either. Have you seen this shit filled ad with Preity Zinta where he poses as a Russian, an Arab and an asshole with sunflowers?
Here's how it starts:

SRK: (driving up to her in Xing car, pokes stupid-ass head out window) "OI VAMUSHKA! Sinyomah gushka mushka?!..."(motions for a drive)
Preity : (declines, no real surprises)
SRK: "BLOODYVOSTOK!!!!" *dumbass*

Cut to next scene.
SRK: (driving in same car as Arab with stupid ass headband)
"AAYYEEYAMMMA yamma yammmaa hariyamm??? "
Preity: "Fuck off"

Cut to next scene, it's a field
(drives up as an asshole....this time gets OUT like an asshole, holds up sunflowers like an asshole, trying his best to put a sexy face but failing and instead looking like he just lost his front teeth. But this time he's smarter. Says nothing, just offers flowers)
Preity: "Fuck off, I got a field full here."
(Dejectedly, heads back, almost gets in)
Preity: Oh, fuck it all. Let's go already. Maybe I'll geta chance to drop your ass off a cliff. For the sake of women everywhere"
(I think that's the most logical reason she'd want to ride with him. For the life of me I can't think of any other.)

When v bid Adios....!!!

2005-06-18T13:05:00.001+05:30

I was just talking to a friend of mine today, someone who graduates from high school this year. And the conversation turned to parting. We've all been there, done that. Stood there, on that last day of school...on a day like that, it doesn't matter whether you hated school or loved it, whether you just passed your exams or came out top of your class. All that matters is the sudden nostalgia that hits you, even when you're still standing there with all the people you went to school with. All that matters is those memories, which flood your brain, memories of studying for exams, panicking over unfinished homework, working side by side on the big, year ending, annual school musical, chilling during lunch break, losing races and having a hearty laugh about it on Sports Day, sitting in the back row and spending the entire class talking nonsense, getting caught for it, getting yelled at for it...all that.

And so much more.

And in the blink of an eye, somehow, all those memories flood your brain. And you look around at the people you've spent the last 10 odd years of your life with, the people you've literally GROWN UP with, in every sense of the word. And there's real beauty in that moment. That moment holds, for each of us, an epiphany. We have it right there and then, even if we don't realize it instantly. There will never be another place quite like school, we realize. We'll never love or hate or FEEL so PASSIONATELY about anything else like we feel about school. About how we hated our dorky uniforms but at the same time loved the almost ceremonial act of putting on our school blazer...-------admit it-----, you thought it was cool and all grown up to put on a jacket! It's a beautiful little epiphany, it's a rite of passage. As clichéd as it sounds, its the closing of a chapter, the start of a new one. There has never been as much possibility anywhere else as there is in that single moment. But where there is brand new possibility, there is also uncertainty. There is also fear.

All our lives, in school, we were protected. Things were done for us...everything was ordered, everything was so settled, so...ARRANGED. There was no uncertainty. We bitched about homework, but we never went to bed worried about an uncertain tomorrow or a shaky future. The luxuries of childhood, something we can never quite enjoy ever again.

But the possibility and promise of a great new adventure always overcomes fear...thank God for that. But in that moment, along with nostalgia, along with the possibility, along with the epiphany, along with the fear (it's a complex moment, yes)...there is also, ultimately sadness. All these people we've grown up with, all these people we've stood shoulder to shoulder with... we make promises to stay in touch, we hug each other, we shake hands, we're never going to forget each other we say.

And yet, somehow, we do.

A lot of them, we haven't seen since then. Some of them, we don't even know what they're doing. Some of them are still our best friends. Some of them, let's face it, we'll probably never seen again. Thinking about it even now, all these years (seven and a half) after leaving school, it still makes me want to cry sometimes. But yet, the sadness is kinda beautiful too. Because everytime you remember, you smile. Everytime you remember, you realize one thing.

You belonged, and will always belong to something special. Something beautiful.

So, as school ends for you Anirudh, i'm going to toss you a few clichés. I guess the only reason a cliché is a cliché is because nothing fits a particular situation quite like it does. So Anirudh.

Never forget

At the same time, don't judge whatever you do next in terms of..."school was so awesome, this'll suck"

Live

Do what you love...love what you do, or you're in trouble. I learned this the hard way.

And most importantly, remember one thing. No matter what, your school friends (aside from your family) are the people who knew you first, in fact they might know you better than your family, because they see your devious side too. Your school friends...they're your first friends. There will be friends as awesome as them. But they'll never be the same as them.
So...cherish.

C'est la vie....

2005-06-10T22:29:00.000+05:30

We're lazy, that's what we are. Everytime something a little out of the usual happens, something that's either ironic or funny or sad or just plain blip-on-the-radar-dish, we're so lazy, we couldn't be bothered to judge it or figure it out... All we do is smile and say "Thats life"

"C'est la vie"

So life, apparently, is waking up at 7 a.m. Monday morning and turning the tap on a bit too hard, so water drenches your shorts...

Life is someone walking in with chocolate cake just when you feel like eating some.

Life is falling for someone and finding out they're already seeing someone else.

Life is a traffic jam when you're already late (it's like raaaeeeeyainnn, on your wedding day and all that).

Life is a baby shitting on your brand new shirt while it grins at you...

"C'est la vie"

Can't categorize or figure something out? Couldn't be bothered?
Just toss it into the box labelled "Life"

Damn we're lazy.

V just Lost....sigh..

2005-05-30T16:07:00.000+05:30

Dogs versus Humans(No matter who wins, we lose)

* If you're a human & you're having sex, a posse of other humans doesn't try to pull you off your mate (except in some parts of rural India) or bark & howl in the background.
Dogs 0
Humans 1

* If you're human & are part of a family, you don't have to make big eyes at dinner to have a go at the tasty scraps.
Dogs 0
Humans 2

* If you're a doggie, you are allowed to lie on your back with your legs in the air, genitalia on display. Publicly. If you're human & you do that, you're arrested for indecent exposure. Except in Florida.
Dogs 1
Humans 2

* When you're a doggie, no matter what the sexual position is, it's still doggie-style.
Dogs 1
Humans 3

* If you're human & you piss where you wish, you're filthy. If you're a dog & you do that, you're marking your territory.
Dogs 2
Humans 3

* Humans - no fleas.
Dogs 2
Humans 4

* Dog babies very often look cuter than human babies.
Dogs 3
Humans 4

* Dog adults look cuter than human adults (esp the male human adults). It's statistically proven.
Dogs 4
Humans 4

* If you're a human, you don't have to smell someone's ass when you're meeting them for the first time or as a general form of greeting.
Dogs 4
Humans 5

* If you're a dog & you sit with your tongue hanging out, salivating, it's natural - you're panting. If you're a human & you do that, people like me will call you a Perv.
Dogs 5
Humans 5

* If you're a dog & you eat another dog, it's a dog-eat-dog world. If you're human & you eat other humans, you're unfairly labelled a cannibal.
Dogs 6
Humans 5

* If you're a dog & you eat a human, you're rabid & are put to sleep. If you're a human & you eat a dog, you're Chinese.
Dogs 6
Humans 6

* When humans visit their doctors, the doctors don't wedge their hands up their arses.
Dogs 6
Humans 7

* Lassie's about as bitchy as dogs can get.
Dogs 7
Humans 7

The Unspoken.....

2005-05-21T13:35:00.000+05:30

Bitchism - a religion which was created by our ancestors but which hasn't been written about till today...

it was predominantly a female philosophy but now has been passed on to the males too....

the philosophy of this religion is that the believers and followers make it a point to 'religiously' fuck up the lives of those close to them...

personal convictions/morals/principals when put to the test in real life can reveal levels of hypocrisy unknown to mankind...

i'm too pissed now to add anymore philosophies about 'Bitchism' - do add your own philosophies too....

"Just Bring IT"...

2005-05-02T12:01:00.000+05:30

Well, the another day is just about over and another approaches the dawn. I often wonder what tomorrow will actually bring. I’ve had my share of ups and downs. Heartaches and sorrows. Laughter and excitement. Today I am optimistic about my future. I stand tall with strength and pride. I am ready to take on the world. I don’t make New Year’s resolutions, however my goals are quite clear. Better myself (all inclusive)!!!!

Number 1. Find patience and give life my all -

Nmber 2. Find my heart and my soul -

Number 3. Be strong - yet strong enough that I can still laugh.

And finally, reach out to those that I’ve let slip through my hands. I am ready for the WORLD!!! I can take whatever you throw my way. I want to believe in the many things I’ve lost through out the years. I want and will dream again. 2005 will be my year to shine….for me.

What’s in your bag?

" Y "

2005-04-26T14:01:00.000+05:30

The urge to be unique....

Its important to ppl not just to be right.. but to be only ones who are right.. there is always a white or black.... its almost never like ur right and so am I

When ppl say I am trying to do something different... I wonder why different? Why can't one try do something good.. not different.. dont strive to be different... strive to be wat U R...

The goodness in what one might do might be the fact that it is fresh or new..

When I think of religious tolerance I wonder... why does it matter for a person that only his path to the lord is right and not the others.. why can't he be content with his path being right.. why does anothers have to be wrong?

Racism.. Ego all have their roots in the same...

Lord of the Rings.....(a review)

2005-04-17T08:58:00.000+05:30

What do i say, where do i begin.

"Here, at the end of all things", perhaps?

I just watched Return Of The King, the concluding chapter in the Lord Of The Rings saga.

The Matrix trilogy...over...

Lord Of The Rings trilogy...over...

Has the golden age of movie geekdom passed?
Who knows.
So, is Return Of The King an effective conclusion to the Lord Of The Rings saga?
Nope. Absolutely not.

It's so much more than that. So, so so so so much more.

In fact, its the worst sort of conclusion ever. I hate you Peter Jackson. You can't end this series, you can't. It can't be over...

Keep making Lord Of The Rings movies forever and ever and ever. More tales of Frodo Baggins, Samwise The Brave, Aragorn son of Arathorn, Legolas of the Woodland Realm, Gimli Son of Gloin and of course, Gandalf The White...

I'm lost for words...plain and simple.
More importantly, i think the english language is lost for them...

I could sit down with a thesaurus and dredge up as many synonyms for spectacular, brilliant, awesome, incredible, breath taking, epic, legendary, beautiful, moving... and i still wouldn't have done justice to the movie.

You know how you feel when you win a race, a competition of some sort, top your class...anything?

You know how you get a particular feeling, one that you just can't explain in words?
This is one of those movies. This is one of those feelings.

I'm sitting here and my brain is trying to come up with words, phrases, anything to describe the movie...but it can't...
Because Return Of The King isn't about brains, its about heart.

Lord Of The Rings, on the whole, is about heart.
LOTR isnt a story about a hairy-footed hobbit called Frodo Baggins who set out to rid the world of a particularly nasty ring.
Oh no siree bob.

It's a saga of courage, extraordinary courage, a tale of honour, finding yourself... it's about standing up and being counted, its about doing your part, its about friendships, the ties that bind, the loyalties and love that sees us through the deepest, darkest days of our lives.

That whole para up there sounds cliched, i know...but its true... thats what its about...

Like Sam says to Frodo in The Two Towers, its about holding onto something, about holding onto the hope that there's still good in this world...

So, Return Of The King, as a movie, a cinematic experience...
Unbelievable. You've never seen anything like it before, you'll never see anything like it again.

It's a gigantic film, even by Hollywood's extravegant standards. It's a cliched film, even by Hollywood's cliched standards. It's a deeply emotional, even melodramatic film.
And thank God for that.

But this film, this entire story, is about so much more than battles.
It's about the people who fight these battles, the journeys and quests they undertake.

Frodo Baggins, ring bearer extraordinaire. What a brilliant performance by Elijah Wood as someone totally consumed, wrecked, utterly destroyed by his quest, by his journey, by the responsibility he's taken upon himself. His once happy go lucky character gets darker and darker and darker...and Wood excels. The character Frodo, is so fantastic, as someone brought to their knees by what they've undertaken...by doing the right thing. Someone practically destroyed by having to choose between right and wrong, good and bad.

Aragorn... The King himself... the character is a true leader of men. Bold, fearless as a leader should be... as upright and honest as a saint... his utter devotion to the quest, to protecting Frodo and then Middle Earth is beautiful. Viggo Mortensen is pitch perfect in his part.

Billy Boyd and Dominic Monaghan, as Merry and Pippin. Man.... i love the chemistry between these two guys, they feed off each other, play off each other, working beautifully together, bringing genuine innocence and playfullness to their characters... what i love most about Pippin and Merry is the fact that realistically, they, more than anyone else, have no reason to be where they are... they're a bunch of irresponsible pranksters who just stumble into the quest...but once they're in... they're in all the way. Their devotion to Frodo and more importantly, to each other, is deeply touching... love these guys...

Orlando Bloom as Legolas... extremely controlled performance by Bloom. Legolas is one of those characters that rarely breaks into huge displays of emotion. His elven face is impassive, calm, collected. This guy lets his actions do the talking. The best word i can come up with for him, is Cowboy. Legolas is essentially, Middle Earth's very own cowboy. There's this thing he does in Return Of The King (you'll know it when you see it), that'll just send your jaw to the floor, first class, no return.

Gimli... John Rhys Davies... lovely performance, both comic relief as well as core member of the Fellowship. Davies effectively brings out the stubborness of the dwarves, and their sheer resilience and unconditional courage... take a bow mate...

Gandalf...Ian McKellan... what do i say about this guy? About every subtle facial twitch, every solemnly delivered line of advice, every ominous piece of news. Wizard, mentor, champion... that's Gandalf for you... the cornerstone of the fellowship, the cornerstone of Middle Earth's fightback... that's Gandalf for you...
While everyone is downright brilliant, there's one character and performance that just wins you over, right from the start...

Samwise The Brave... man oh man. Sean Astin is just incredible... innocent, faithful...dogged...and most importantly... the single most courageous character in the story.

Samwise The Brave. The epitome of courage. Here's a guy who would do anything at all for his friend and master. Anything at all. He'd do anything it takes...he follows Frodo to hell and back... in fact, when Frodo isn't strong enough, he takes him by the hand and LEADS him into hell and back. His loyalty is heartbreakingly touching... There's this one line he has in Fellowship Of The Ring, when Frodo leaves alone, he follows him into the water and almost drowns...why? "Because i made a promise Mr Frodo...a promise. Don't you leave him Samwise Gamgee, Gandalf said... and i don't mean to Mr. Frodo, i don't mean to."

That sums Samwise up... plain and simple. He is a man of his word, a man of honour...his entire existence, he's known nothing more than his peaceful little Shire, and here he is, thrust into a quest that will decide the fate of the world. A daunting task for the hardiest of men. But Sam rises to the occasion like an absolute champion... because that's what he is.
The friendship that he and Frodo have... it's the sort you'd love to have in your life... pure loyalty, devotion, love. "I can't carry the ring for you Mr.Frodo...but i can carry you." That says it all. Frodo may well be the central character of the story...but Samwise is it's hero... it's Champion.
The loveliest part about the Hobbits is that, their whole life, they've known nothing beyond their utopian Shire. It's a small world, a happy one...paradise, you'd call it. And suddenly, there's a world they have to fight for, a darkness they have to fight against. There are decisions they have to make, consequences they have to bear... And every single one of them stands up and does their part...more than their part.

Like Aragorn says when they bow to him... "You, my friends... bow to no one"
I could go on forever, honestly i could. I already have in fact.
But Return Of The King, please please please please please go watch it, it's a piece of legendary cinema, one that the world will never ever forget. It's an epic, in every sense of the word. Cinematically, it is perfection all the way.
Brilliant screenplay, masterful editing, special effects unlike anything we've ever seen, cinematography that has you gaping, a background score that damn near moves you to tears...and most importantly, extremely large amounts of heart... good, old fashioned heart...
Peter Jackson, take a bow... you're The King mate... You bow to no one...

The ONE...!!!

2005-04-07T13:21:00.000+05:30

Was thinking of a Girl who used to be special. thinking of her while I was listening to John Mayer's Split Screen Sadness. (obviously had an enlightening moment or else there would be no point to this post).
I was thinking of how we let go. It was easy. Too easy. No pain, no sting, nothing. And I wish there had been. I wish there could have been something to show me that there was a possibility that I might have made a mistake. I want to point a finger somewhere.
I wish we fought for us. I wanted her to call me and ask, no wait, demand why. Why when she had gone through a year and a half of weirdness, I give it up in a month. And I wish I could tell her how she had changed and become less appealing. But no,
It was just 'Ok'. Two syllables only, a big number of syllables from relief.
What hurts now though is that we were buddies. We were the friends that 'Friends' weren't. We were way cooler. And she let all of that go. Fair trade I suppose, but that doesn't make it ok.
And now, I don't know where she is, I don't know if I wish I do. But I hope wherever she is, she's ok. I worry for her sometimes.

EDIT: A passing thought for my first ever crush........my puppy love.....SHWETA is the name .....

Entry : Couples Only...!!!

2005-04-05T22:49:00.000+05:30

So i was walking to the barbershop for a haircut yesterday and i noticed an odd thing. I crossed one street, saw a car with two people in it. Guy and girl. Holding hands. Obviously a couple.

Walked on, crossed another street...saw a car with two people in it. Guy and girl. Holding hands. Obviously a couple. Fair enough.

I walk on, finish crossing the street and as i'm walking on the pavement, i see these two people coming towards me. Guy and girl. Holding hands. Obviously a couple.

I walked ahead and i just before i entered the barbershop. I saw two people coming towards me again... you know how the rest of it goes.

On a ten minute walk to the barbershop, i saw roughly 10 couples. One a minute. That's more couples a minute than ideas George W Bush has in a year.

And they looked happy and all. And the only reason i can think of, for seeing all those couples... is that at 9:30 am on a Monday morning... the Lord is bored, he has nothing to do, he's tired of laughing at people stuck in rush hour traffic jams of His making.

And He sees me; and thinks to Himself, "Let's have a laugh shall we?"

And so he shows me all those couples. I can almost hear the punchline and the laughter;

"HA HA! There are six billion and one people on this planet. Three billion girls, three billion and one guys. HA HA! I paired everyone else off, you're the only one left standing. HA HA!"

Which basically means that it's as if i'm the only chump who got left standing in this game of Cosmic Musical Chairs.

I've been single for a while now. Roughly twenty two years. Not bad for someone who's as old as me... 22 years old and all.

I wonder why i'm single. I've been wondering that for a while now. I've got a few theories.

Maybe it's because of the way i look. I took a picture of myself yesterday and i have come to the scientific conclusion that my head seems to shaped like a fat peanut. And if you count the last few days, then its a fat unshaved peanut.

Maybe it's because i talk too much. How much do i talk? Well, if they'd given me a chance in 1914 to give the Allied troops a pep talk before World War I just before they went into battle then World War I would have started in 1917.

Maybe its because in spite of talking so much, i make as much sense as a straight woman in a male gay bar. See...i say stuff like straight woman in a male gay bar.

Maybe its because i have bad luck or something. I don't believe in superstitions and bad luck and all that crap... when black cats cross my path...THEY die. I'm not very superstitious about walking under ladders and black cats and stuff. But i'm beginning to wonder. I mean, i was walking down the street the other day (i do that a lot dont i?), and this black cat crossed my path. I stopped dead in my tracks for a second. But i figured that the whole black cat thing was a stupid superstition. But then something happened that made me believe, that scared me. Black cats DO carry bad luck.

Because just as i walked four steps ahead...i saw a fat politician.

He didn't have a peanut head though.

Maybe its because im a pain. A big fat pain. The sort of pain you get right after your doctor says "HA HA this won't hurt a BIT! You won't even feel the prick of the needle!"

There could be a million reasons.

Maybe the stars aren't right. Do you think its a bad sign if you turn to your horoscope section the newspaper and all it says under your star sign is "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA oohhh you poor CHAP!"

Could be any of those reasons, could be none of them. Point is...i'm always single.

Screw it. I'm too sleepy to care. In some other paralell dimension, there is a Krishna who is a major league playboy with tons of HOT women keeping him good company. Who cares?

I bet my head makes a better peanut than his.

Money N Men...!!!

2005-03-28T23:04:00.000+05:30

What if we're a cosmic fluke?

What if we just got shit-bag lucky that we're on the right planet with the right sort of star at the right sort of distance from us to provide us with the right sort of conditions to exist?

You know when people say, hey, there's only a ONE in a billion chance of something happening... they use it to say that something is practically impossible...

What if we ARE that one in a billion? The fluke off-chance of the universe?

What if we ARE just the one planet that electricity and cosmic permutations and combinations threw together and developed to the heightened stage of free porn and cola?

We learn, we grow, we sit at a desk and pull a paycheck...

We stay alive to pull a paycheck

We pull a paycheck to keep ourselves alive...

Why?

Why keep ourselves alive?

No no, Im not being suicidal... Im just being contemplative... what ENDS are we staying alive for? What am I keeping myself fit and healthy for? To just grow old and one day not be fit anymore and then die?

Surely pulling a paycheck and staying alive and comfortable isn't the ends of our existence?

But what if it IS? What if we're the universe's biggest fluke, and we just ARE... we just BE and there is NO grand scheme of things, no grand plan that we've been assembled here for? We're here to stay alive by making money and vice versa...

"No Grand Scheme will be handed out upon this watery planet. Your life is pointless"

Tell me then... does that frighten you? Or liberate you?

Rang BhArSe........

2005-03-22T14:46:00.000+05:30

I used to play with color a lot as a kid, around Holi time... now dont get me wrong, this isn't one o those fire n brimstone rants about how Holi is bad for your soul and will damn you to hell for screwing the environment over... no no, go ahead, play Holi, know yourself out... heres some money to buy the colour...

Just don't wake me up for it...

The thing is, Holi, like a LOT of other festivals, happens ridiculously early in the morning...

Which was fine as a kid really... that whole zest for life, enthusiastic play-with-the-colony-friends stage of life

and even now... if you're gonna play at a civillized hour...like post 11 am... count me in... but then again, by noon everything starts winding up... so on second thoughts...leave me a note... besides... its always a holiday everytime...what a waste of a holiday!

Though as a kid it used to be fun

Like the time i rang my own doorbell, splattered in color, and my mum opened the door and said, "kya hua? kaun chaahiye aapko?"

Or the time i was walking down the street after one particularly zestful Holi morning and i saw my old schoolteacher across the road... so i ran across to her to say hello, because she was one of my favorite... except for the fact that she ran away, thinking it was some random goonda coming to assault her

Aahhh Holi...

And there was this time my friend and i got really pumped up about holi and went out at the crack of dawn only to realise that we were the only two fools awake at that hour

so we spent one hour merrily using our pichkaari's on each other

Then we were wet and felt cold and went back home...

End of days play

and then we went downstairs in the evening

and on top of a cupboard in the porch we found a packet of color... Ever since then, we've thought that thats the single coolest cupboard EVER!

So we went down there the next day and figured hey! lets try our luck again why dont we!

And so we did

And we actually found another bloody packet

Except for the fact that this was a packet of white powder... but we were young and naive then, so we figured hey... white paint!cool... so we dragged out a bucket of water and tossed the "white paint" into it and stirred it around...

And three seconds later we had this big bucket of froth and soap suds on our hands... That taught us a lesson or two about getting excited about free color from the skies...

And people seem to play it in extremes don't they these days?

Its either really crappy oil color that NEVER comes off or eggs or some weird repugnant shit...

Or the sort of people that walk up to you, say "Happy Holi!" and smear exactly one dot of gulal onto your face and run away....

And then there's bhang... For those of you who don't know what Bhang is, loosely translated into English it means "Drink me and i'll fuck your head and insides up worse than Hannibal Lecter on the lookout for a midnight snack"

Aaahhh holi...

Hellooooooo Mate....

2005-03-15T15:11:00.000+05:30

There's something about one of those times... one of those times where you're just lying in bed and a friend of yours calls or messages you and you just talk...

And in the course of the conversation, the person's telling you stuff, opening up to you, welcoming you into their life, sharing a part of it with you...

And in that moment, you realize, just realize what a long way you've come with that person. There's something so fundamentally beautiful about that realization. It's the ultimate ode to evolution, the ultimate testament to the fact that we're capable of developing and growing.

You remember the first time you met that person, you remember all the stuff you guys have done together, you remember how building a friendship is also a courtship of sorts, you remember how you courted each other. You remember all the times you've laughed, all the times you've been silently melancholy together...

And then you come back to the present, right here and now, having a conversation with that person, and you smile to yourself because you've travelled a road with someone you just HAPPENED to meet on your journey... and now that person is your fellow pilgrim, your travelling companion...

And you've come a long way with them, from a "Hi, I'm krishna" to being a part of their life, important or otherwise. It's one of those moments where you unquestionably believe in a God and figure he's telling you... yeah man... you matter, you're here aren't you? You're important to someone, important enough for them to want to share a part of their life with you...

I had one of those moments this morning and well... realizing you and a person have come a long, long way....absolutely rocks...

MeRa NuMbEr AyEgA.....

2005-03-09T22:16:00.000+05:30

Sometimes it's the smallest, most insignificant thing that makes u lose your mind. And after you lost it, the situation becomes ridiculously silly and dumb to you. Then you wonder about the state of your existence in the world, it's just a passing phase. Everything's a passing phase. If so...When will all these phases end and the real life begin? Probably never..
Age 17- Desperately want girlfriend.

Age 18- Failed attempts discourage you. Hope for better luck in the future.

Age 19- Na haveing a girlfriend is nothing special. Waste to time and money. Need to concentrate on studies, need to make something of oneself. Can have fun later.

Age 20- Wouldn't mind haveing a fling. Would prefer to have some fun before College starts. Like almost every descent looking girl you meet. Various attempts made to get lucky.

Age 21- Fail miserably . Then again havein a girlfriend is not for me. Single life is great. Life is good. Need to concentrate on future. Will have fun in the future.

Age 22- Damn everyone around has girlfriend. Again work towards getting lucky but find no one worthy and of course luck isn't on ones side.

Conclusion: Conclude for urself....

and this years NOBLE goes to....

2005-03-03T17:10:00.000+05:30

so people early today morning I hit upon this idea on how to win the
nobel prize for peace ---

You need to become a
------------------------------------------------------------

You guessed it right --- A MARRIAGE COUNSELLOR ( dont be shocked -- I
have proved my theory below )

see marriages have fights -- and sometimes they go to counsellers ---

Hence if you are succesful in resolving a rift --- YOU HAVE CREATED PEACE

and if you solve the issues of many couples then YOU HAVE CREATED A LOT OF PEACE

off course one issue which Shanky was pointing out was

Shanky : but it doesnt involve political disputes and international
relations..right?

but even this issue was solved when I realised this

Kittu : well it may na
Kittu : example
Kittu : Musharaff has a crush on Manmohan Singhs wife
Kittu : then what will happen
Kittu : tell me tell me

so then people if u want a peace prize become a shrink -- the marriage kind :)

I was thinking of copyrighting this idea -- but for the good of human
kind --- i am not --- let people benefit :D

a passing thought...

2005-02-27T23:40:00.000+05:30

Perusing my blog, thinking about just exactly why I whine about my shit, sparked a realization. Most of lifes little pains are always more complained about that actual serious problems. Deep pains, true pains, life threatening conditions...all of these you never hear anyone complaining about. The terminally ill don't wake up every day and go "Oh how harshly I've been fucked!", they just go on with the day and try to take what they can before their end. Not that I'm saying us "normal people" are any luckier, I mean hell, we're all gonna die one day. It's just a matter of when, where, and how. Sadly enough though, even these things don't matter. In a few generations, even the greatest of us are forgotten. Realizing this, I wondered why I bitch about my problems and discuss hopes and dreams at all. I think searching for truth is far too taxing. Searching for purpose, pointless. Just forge your own, make it work, do what you must. Nothing will matter a few years from now, and through it all, our lives are just blinks of an eye. They seem so important to us but they're really not significant at all. We claim to have a sanctity and quality of life. Nothing but bullshit. The only reason our lives have "value" is because we say they do, and anything not worth having around isn't deemed worthy of life. Now mind you I'm not saying this out of anger, nor am I whining about this. This is just one of those things that you always know, just never think about or bring up so you feel a little better each day when you wake up. To conclude: am i a manic dreamer, or just a complete psychopath aren't I? (I'm actually very very happy while I'm writing this. Despite what the tone may seem to be.)

Project FeVeR....

2005-02-20T16:28:00.000+05:30

There are just some days where you're absolutely wildly enthusiastic to do project work and kick some hard ass, and present the best project you possibly can.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Sorry, couldn't keep a straight face any longer. Ok, maybe there ARE days like that...

Just not for me.

Now... this project that i have... i was reasonably interested in it, reasonably enthusiastic about it, reasonably reasonable about it even. Ready to work at it...

Until we got the survey questionnaire...

Now, for those who don't know what a "survey questionnaire" is, it's a "survey questionnaire". This is basically a little piece of paper invented by Satan on the day she had her period.

So now that we've established that surveys are horrible and Satan is female, coming back to the project.

I don't know WHO came up with this survey, but it is the single most unbelievably badly structured survey in the universe. It must have been some severly socially retarded piece of hellspawn that came up with this survey. How else do you explain my having to ask people questions like

"What are your aspirations and fears about the latest technology?"

And my favorite

"Do u believe that E-transactions are easier early in the morning?"

By the time Monday rolled around i was Officially Disenchanted with this project...

I am now Officially in a state of Full Blooming Hatred.

Don't be surprised if you find something in day after tomorrow's newspaper headlines that reads like this:

STUDENTS FORCE TEACHER TO EAT 100 QUESTIONNAIRES AT GUNPOINT.
Lady recovers but still claims to "have a bad case of acidity."

Sigh

Edit: Above-mentioned project has now been scrapped completely. All knowledge of its existence will be denied.

a lil boyz thoughts....

2005-02-17T09:35:00.000+05:30

when eve brought woe to all mankind
Old Adam called her Wo-man
But when wooed with love so kind
He then pronounced her Woo-Man
But now,with folly and with pride
Their husbands pockets trimming
The women are so full of whims
That men pronounce them Wimmen.

What i learnt about women in my 22 years:

No means no, yes means no...maybe means no.

This is how they think:

"Man, i REALLY dont want to go for that party tomorrow. ITS GOING TO SUCK! It'll be AWFUL! I dont feel like going!"

"Umm, so dont go"

"Ooohhh! But i have something REALLLY nice that i can wear! So i'll go!"

When they scream, they go ultrasonic... glass shatters, heart patients fall dead on the spot and dogs go rabid.

One shouldn't try understanding them. Its a fundamentally impossible task... think about it...the basis for understand something is Logic. When there is a fundamental logic to something, you understand it... but women have ZERO logic, hence the question of understanding does not arise...

They hinder drinking sessions with ridiculous utopian notions and ideas like "responsibility" and "sobriety"...

They don't appreciate the effort that goes into cultivating the perfect beer belly. They frown upon it...little do they know how much Men pride themselves on the fact that it has been nurtured using only the finest in beer technology. Non believers...

Some of them don't like The Matrix. Kill em all.

They are incredibly bad drivers. I personally know one who (simultaeneously) spoke on her cellphone, cut lanes, broke a signal, got flagged down by the cops and when asked, didnt have her license.

They do silly things. For example, abovementioned bad driver, on being stopped by the cop made the mistake of calling him "uncle"... this almost landed her in jail... luckily she back pedalled in time to call him "brother"

They leak. They are prone to suddenly getting extremely emotional and suddenly leaking on your shoulder... they call this "crying". It scares the pants off me when they do that to me. They suddenly start soggying your shoulder, leaking and you dont have the faintest idea about what you're sposed to do! Its like...help... err...anyone? errr...shes leaking! help?

Some of em can't stop talking about their ex boyfriends even when they're out with you. If not the ex boyfriend, then they talk about all the guys that are making a pass at em...way to go...nice way to make a guy feel special...

Most of em have longer hair than guys.

They are extremely easy to piss off. This makes me happy. Its great fun winding people up.

All girls hate other girls. This fascinates me.

They expect guys to be "sensitive" and they want guys to "listen"...we do listen... to the television!

Melodrama is not a character trait... it is a genetic one.

99 percent of them hate me.

I wonder why?

EDIT : Gals there is something called EUPHEMISM remember that.

A Band of BrOtHeR's....

2005-02-15T22:47:00.000+05:30

What a time to get inspired, 2:22 a.m. Might as well make use of it I guess....!!!

Just looking around youself and observing the dynamics of relationships people around you have afforded you some of the simplest vicarious pleasures available to us as a race.

It is, of course fantastic to be a part of any kind of special relationship, but you can never just objectively observe any relationship you're in simply because you're too busy enjoying it. But when you look at a similar relationship from a distance you can't help but grin and marvel at the way six billion of us have been programmed. We've been programmed, every one of us, to be able to get along on different levels with SO many different people. It speaks wonders for the fabric of our existence, be it at a genetic or cultural level, that every single one of us just SOMEHOW develops characteristics that allow us to find common ground with other people, leading to long-lasting, touching, devoted friendships.

I had this semi-epiphany/philosophical wondering the other day when I hitched a ride with two friends of mine. The two of them have sort of grown up together and are REALLY close. It was an incredible feeling just sitting there and listening to them, listening to the subtle differences in tone of voice when they're speaking to each other as opposed to speaking with me. The easy intimacy, the feeling of just KNOWING each other, cracking little insider jokes, talking of common friends...

You listen to all that and you grin and think about how that happens with you and your closest friends as well, and how it must seem exactly like that to an outsider keenly observing you...

Its one of those "Damn it's good to be alive!" things...

Calling All Creatures of The Night....

2005-02-14T22:41:00.000+05:30

Nightclubs...

Nightclubs are very dangerous places. All sorts of unseemly creatures roam these "clubs" (as they are known in common parlance), often hand in hand, often hand in, well, other areas...

Now a lot of these people have a certain affliction; one that is extremely dangerous, horrifying and potentially life-threatening...

This is the Evil of The Dance...

"Lets Dance" they say...

How does one explain to them that one's understanding of "rhythm" ends at the viewing of a pendulum swing back and forth on its never ending cycle?

How does one explain to them that one's knowledge of this ancient form of witchcraft, this acient form of The Dance, comes from watching the Ketchup Sisters on a random music channel at some random hour of the night?

How does one explain that he came factory fitted with two left feet instead of the usual pattern of right and left...

Of course... one simply doesnt...

Instead, one meekly says "Ok"

And lives to regret those very words...

For the night that you choose to be at that "club" happens to be the Celebrated Night of All Things Evil... the night that many at the "club" call HIP-HOP NIGHT...

What this basically means that a lot of songs sung by a lot of people from different areas of New York get played. Some of these songs are "HIP" and some are rather "HOP"

That's rather "phot" I'm told...

These songs seek to trip both your left feet and pile them into misery even further and deeper than normal... for their "rhythm" is erratic at best, and the lyrics are punctuated randomly by assorted members of the monkey family suddenly yelling "FUCK" and "BLING BLING!" (the sounds of elevator doors opening and closing inspire these people i'm told) and "MAH BOO!", the last of which i believe is a Dolphin mating call.

The members of the Evil Clan of Dance grab you and take you to the dance floor, insisting that they will "teach you" followed by this simple advice, "Watch Me"

Ummm, ok, but can't i do that from that quiet little corner with my quiet little drink?

BHUMP BHUMP goes the beat, louder than the average Concorde, re-arranging every single internal organ (BHUMP BHUMP!!)

So one takes a tentative step and slowly sticks one arm out...

"BLING BLING!" says random monkey in the song...

Hey this isn't so bad, you figure...

until dancing partner begins moving legs as well, patting your leg as if to say "Ambulate and set in motion this set of muscles"

Arms and legs... both?! Together?! Like at once?!

I AM JUST ONE MAN!!! NOT A MACHINE!!! I CAN EITHER MOVE MY HANDS OR MY LEGS!!! I AM NOT ONE OF YOU VILE PEOPLE WITH GREATER ABILITIES OF PHYSICAL CONTORTION FOOLS!

BHUMPH BHUMPH!

No that wasnt a beat, that was the sound of my last ounce of dignity and self respect hitting the floor as every single hot woman in a twenty inch radius realizes that I am incapable of graceful physical movement... Hmph... they should see me brush my teeth... I'm a God...

So i spend the rest of the evening doing the Mutated Ketchup Dance, waiting for terrorists or someone to fling the door open and take us all hostage so the evening can finally become "cool" and i'm not the only one afraid to be there anymore...

Hmph

One day a club will be opened, where all those dancing well will have their legs blown off by snipers with sawed-off shotguns...

And on that day, shall i bask in my righteous glory of retribution and revenge...

does it or doesn't it....

2005-02-12T19:25:00.000+05:30

Anti Cola Advertisment:

Scene #1:

A man stands facing a Coca Cola stall. Dressed casually (jeans, grey shirt, sneakers), sipping his cola. Cold bottle of cola. Sipping it, minding his own business, saying nothing. He's towards the extreme right of the frame. A man walks in from the left side of the frame, grabs his bottle and starts hitting the cola drinker over the head. Over and over and over and over and over again. The drinker twitches, twitches, twitches and finally lies still. The other man walks away. Fade to black.

Words appear on screen.

COLA KILLS.

Pro-Cola Advertisment:

Scene #1:

A man stands facing a Coca Cola stall. Dressed casually (jeans, grey shirt, sneakers), sipping his cola. Cold bottle of cola. Sipping it, minding his own business, saying nothing. He's towards the extreme right of the frame. A man walks in from the left side of the frame, grabs his bottle and starts hitting the cola drinker over the head. Over and over and over and over and over again. The drinker twitches, twitches, twitches and finally lies still. The other man walks away. Fade to black.

Words appear on the screen.

COLA DOESN'T KILL PEOPLE.

PEOPLE KILL PEOPLE.

Single and Ready to Mingle,Jingle and Bingle...!!!

2005-02-09T20:11:00.001+05:30

Does anybody else, guys and girls get the sense that there's some sort of official law against single people?

"It is required by law that any person that you, as a single person (irrespective of your gender), are interested in must, at any given time, posess
a. A spouse
b. A boyfriend
c. A girlfriend
d. The quality of not even realizing that you exist...
e. A venereal disease"

Its the sorta thing that makes you take up masturbation as a religion and form of daily exercise... also the sorta thing that makes you a lil money, once in a while...

KRISHNA's EXPERT GULTI MONEY MAKING TACTIC #14839

Step 1: See a girl you're mildly interested in.
Step 2: Fuck step 1, see a girl you think is even mildly cute...
Step 3: Casually mention to friend seated next to you, "Hey, that girl is really pretty and has such a nice smile"
Step 4: Wait for friend to walk into well-sprung trap. The sound of the trap being sprung is something like this, "So, why don't you go speak to her and ask her out or something?"
Step 5: Revel in the knowledge of the fact that you now own his ass and will soon also own some of his money
Step 6: Since you of course, know the law of Destiny and Nature, you shake your head and say, "Nah, she probably has a boyfriend..."
Step 7: Feign interest as your friend encourages you... then utter the words, "Wanna bet?"
Step 8: "Yes ok"
Step 9: Allow friend to make discrete inquiries, allow him to return crestfallen, allow him to give you money.
Step 10: Find another friend, another cafe/pub/hotel. Repeat above steps.

If you're going to be single, wanking and lonely, may as well make some money off it...

P.S: Stray thoughts are dangerous. Mentioned to a person that i thought another person was "kind of cute and fun to talk to"... Found out next day from friends that i was, apparently, madly in love with said person and would soon be married with nine children and a dog named Pappu...
Mentioning random thoughts to friends is inviting shit for your health.

When GULTI Mania strikes.....

2005-02-08T11:25:00.000+05:30

Once there was a boy. He had a house. He lived in that house. It was a nice little house, with nice little rooms and a nice little living room and a nice little quiet atmosphere...

But the boy who lived in the house with the rooms with the atmosphere could not escape his past...

he could not escape who he was

He was a true blue Gulti...

There's no running away from that... nowhere...nohow...

What this meant was that he was related to half the world...

What this means is that thats a lot of people

Now, one day, half of the half of the world that he was related to, decided to come to Hyderabad...

That very day, they decided (after tea and a toilet break), they would stay at the Gulti boy's house with the little rooms with the atmosphere

Thus the true blue Gulti Boy found himself in a home which was swamped with relatives of all shapes (triangles, circles, trapeziums) and sizes (S, M, L, XL, XXL)

Thus the Gulti Boy found himself asleep on the living room floor one night, as opposed to one of the little rooms with the atmosphere...

While he thought that this was quite a spiffy little adventure (to match with the little rooms with the little atmosphere), his pleasure only lasted until early the next morning, when ALLLLL the relatives decided to hold The Great Congregation Of Breakfast With The Masala Chai... Loudly they sang, " CHAI SUPER GA VUNDI I!!"

The Gulti Boy could take no more and his sleep was forever destroyed...

However, the invasion was not without its benefits...no not at all, said the Gulti Boy... he discovered that while large in number, his relatives were quite a lot of fun...

Even though they smoke enough cigarettes to destroy the lungs of a herd of oxen in heat...

So, when the Gulti boy made this discovery, there was much rejoicing...

There was going to be a sunset and violins here...but the Gulti's decided GULT Rap would suit the occasion more...

When half of the half of the half of the world that had visited the Gulti Boy left for their home shores, he got the room with his Gulti Computer back...

And felt that it was extremely important that you hear his tale...

The King Of Bollywood......

2005-02-07T09:18:00.000+05:30

As little kids we all were swept away by the Glitz and Glamour of bollywood,and many heroines became our sweethearts at one oint of time or the other. I have done a lil thinking(yes, i do think),and finally revelled in the knowledge that i know myself a lil better now.....an enlightened sould when it comes to bollywood!!!

Reasons I can't join Bollywood

1. The sheer number of award shows. I'm a lazy bum, i couldn't be bothered to step out of the house for ONE award show a year, forget the one that is now held every hour, on the hour by every single magazine, channel, company etc etc

2. The incestuous cesspools... I don't know Karan Johar, Shah Rukh Khan, Kajol, Priety Zinta, Manish Malhotra, Farah Khan...OHMIGOD!!! I'll never make it! Because everyone knows that these guys are like this All-Stars Club, with no one allowed entry... get a room you inbreeding freaks

3. Im not a star-son...

4. I don't run over people in my Land Cruiser, thus i don't generate enough column inches with my name splattered all over them in stupid tabloids

5. I don't go to random launch parties and functions where the above-mentioned column inches can be filled up by linking me to random women, all of whom probably look uglier than a pickled pig's arse when they take their makeup off.

6. I can't suck up to random producers and directors and call them great and awesome when, in fact, the films they make aren't worth shit

7. I can't just "perform". I can't truthfully be who i am and still prance around on stage, lip-syncing a song and dancing like a fool in heat to some random steps, with some random Babe Of The Week chick

8. I don't understand the need for item numbers

9. Watching everyone in this narcissistic, self-congratulatory industry give each other and themselves pretentious blowjobs makes the bile rise in my throat

10. I'd never understand the heirarchy... At award shows, i'd never know if it was just "Shabana" or "Shabanaji" or "Fardeen" or "Fardeenji" or "Pappu" or "Pappuji". I would never know whose hand im supposed to shake, whose feet im supposed to touch and whose ass im supposed to kick...

11. I don't understand how Shah Rukh Khan can say his wife will "kick the shit" out of him, on stage, to a huge audience watching. Therein lies the difference between our crass, tasteless award shows and the Oscars... so yeah the Oscars are lobbied for, often downright bought...but at least on awards night they let you believe in the magic of the movies... i bet there's tons of people in Hollywood that would say things similar to what SRK said, but "shit"... on stage? Dude...

12. I'd ordinarily list "I CAN'T ACT" here, but given some of the chumps we've got, acting clearly isn't a pre-requisite for the job. Salman Khan, this means you...

When Glory Beckons....

2005-02-04T14:26:00.000+05:30

TROY: SPECIAL EDITION CRITICS CUT

[Guy named Paris meets chick named Helen at a party]

Paris: Ssup?
Helen: Hey cutie...
Paris: Wanna boink?
Helen: Cool, but just so you know, even though I'm married, I'm not easy and i think this is a huge mistake, but lets boink anyway, because my husband is a fat, impotent movie cliche
Paris: Wanna boink?

[Paris and his brother Hector chill on deck of their ship on their way home to Troy]
Hector: Dude, you look guilty. Actually, no you don't because you can't act. But it says so in the script. Fess up...
Paris: So i was at this party last night...
Hector: Uh-oh
Paris: But dude, we're like soul-mates man! I felt this instant connection... i mean, what are the odds... she can't act either! It must be love!
Hector: Logic demands that we return her to Sparta, so i suggest we sail on home instead.
Paris: My niggah!!

[Big bronze man named Achilles shows up at the gates of Troy because he's high on a combination of crack and testosterone]
Achilles: Ssup puny man... The poster tells me i'm in this "For Glory" so I'm going to kick your ass
Hector: You don't know it yet, but by the time the credits roll i'm going to blow both you and Peter O Toole off the screen with my phenomenal acting.
Achilles: We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won't.
Hector: Ummm, right line, wrong movie... where'd you get that chest waxed?
Achilles: Listen Hulk-guy, like gimme the chick so my buds and i can just go get some glory...
Hector: You're making me angry, you wouldn't like me when i'm angry.
Achilles: I challenge you to a duel... DRAW!!
Hector: OOoooh, i love Pictionary!
Achilles: Shut up, bitch... lets fight.
Paris: Yeah Hector dude, fight my battles for me man... I've got a lot on my plate... I mean, you only have a kid and a wife and the defence of your country to think of...
Hector and Achilles (in chorus): Shut up pappu... take your bow and arrows and go play in the corner...
Paris: Hmph... i miss Gimli... i miss my pointy ears...

[Everyone fights everyone, everyone dies]
Helen: Hey cool Paris, we lived!
Paris: Wanna boink?
Helen: I knew I'd always have Paris!

The "Random" Theory...!!!

2005-01-26T13:58:00.000+05:30

Meet Random Student. Up until last week, he lead a happy life, much like yours or mine; he'd wake up in the morning, attend college, hang out with friends and beat up people weaker than him. But these once happy eyes have no spark and laughter in them anymore. Random Student is one of only thousands of students across the city of hyderabad who have been affected by the mysterious disease that doctors are now calling "The Project Menace". Random Student says he isn't sure, but he thinks he contracted it at college, where he was attending class like on any other day when the professor suddenly injected all the students with this life-threatening disease. "The students in front of me all started crying loudly and wetting their trousers but I didn't understand why. I couldn't have known then, the fate that awaited us."

The Project Menace has affected the lives of many students. Common symptoms include being hunched at a computer, copy pasting information from the Internet into a Word document, gouging fellow student's internal organs out with their fingernails, falling to the floor with their mouth foaming and loss of bladder control.

Just yesterday The Project Menace claimed another victim as a student ran naked down the street, screeching his lungs out. This is not a witty turn of phrase, his lungs were in fact ejected from his body at the velocity of a mid-sized hurricane...

While there is no cure for this menace, students are turning their anger and frustration towards Bill Gates, head of Microsoft, for inventing Microsoft Powerpoint, which is commonly used by professors to inject The Project Menace into unsuspecting students.

Cure or no cure, one thing is for certain. For the hapless students of Hyderabad, time, sanity and levels of patience are running out.

S.K. Chaitanya, BBC News,Hyderabad.

"With love" from Kris....

2005-01-20T22:16:00.000+05:30

Because I'm a lovely person and because it’s that time of the year, I'm drawing up a list of goodies and gifts for some of my FAVORITE people. Don’t you love me?!

To our dearest friend Britney Spears we present Extra Resistant Super Strong Body Armour: For All Those Times You Can’t Stop Touching Your Disgusting Self. I never thought I’d ever say “Get a room” to a girl standing on her own! Hit her baby one more time!

To our favorite new moms Gwenyth Paltrow and Julia Roberts, we give an exquisite hardcover edition of “1,001 Baby Names That NORMAL People Use” in case they ever decide to have more children. Hardcover so that if they don’t learn from their first mistakes (“Apple Blyth”, “Phinnaeus Walter”) they can beat themselves to death using the book.

To sweet, gentle and terminally stupid Paris Hilton I present this special high-resolution Navy Seals Standard Night Vision Camera: For All Those Special Night Moments You Want To Film! So we’ll look forward to a sequel of that tape then?

To everyone’s favorite siblings Janet and Michael Jackson; I’d like for you two to have this plastecine Play-Dough.
Michael; this will mold well into the shape of your nose.
Janet; apply liberally to innerwear to prevent another wardrobe malfunction.

To everyone’s SECOND favorite siblings, The Good Brothers Ambani, here; I saw this tube of Fevicol at the gift store and I couldn’t NOT buy it for you! Use liberally… yeh fevicol ka jod hai and all that.

Michael Moore, I have TWO gifts for you; your own hat… and some crow. Eat them both please. And for dessert try some of our EXTRA special home-made Foot-In-Mouth custard.

Ah, to you Mr. George W Bush… what do you give to the man who has everything? Oh I know! Here, please accept this special edition director’s cut DVD of Fahrenheit 9/11! And here’s an English Language Dictionary too.

To the Indian Cricket Team I present this all-paid for, totally free ten year vacation to Tahiti, where we’ve arranged for you have the rare honor and privilege of representing their national team… at hockey.

And finally, to Hyderabad's Page 3 people… in fact!!! To EVERYONE on this list we’d like to apologize. We wanted all of you to get a life as well but sadly none of the stores had them in size “XXL IDIOT”. Ah well, next year then!

The world as today....

2005-01-20T19:45:00.000+05:30

An actual conversation I heard today while getting a drink at the college cafeteria.

Guy #1: "Hey man! Did you do the book review?! I copy pasted the whole thing from the internet. I wrote about 30 percent on my own"

Guy #2: (looking ashamed of his friend): "HA! You wrote on your own! What a guy. My whole thing is copy-pasted! Start to finish! HA HA!"

Guy #1 now feels extremely threatened. His status as a ignorant boor is under threat because he made the effort to write some stuff on his own.

Guy #1: "HA HA man, Actually, even that 30 percent was copied from another site man. HA HA!"

Guy #2: "HA HA"

Sigh... Is it just me or is it frightening that each of them actually wanted to prove that they were the lazier, more incapable of independent thought than the other? That each of them took pride in being incapable of having their own original opinions on a simple book?

Sigh... today I have seen this world's future my friends... is the apocalypse clearly cometh.

Step up to the Plate Son...

2005-01-19T22:25:00.000+05:30

I'm a bit of an exhibitionist... Damned if I'm not proud of it too...

It's an adrenalin thing I think... I'm not an actor, not a musician, not a dancer... Not really a big stage person when you come to think of it... I'd suck at any of the above...

But...

But I love the rush of getting up there, under arc-lights, and/or in front of a big bunch of people and just doing my thing... Presentations, moderating debates, hosting stuff, just... chilling... here's what I love about it...

(Ten)

I love the jitters that snake through your system ten minutes before the start of an event...

(Nine)

I love the involuntary twitching of muscles that just HAPPENS while you're building up... Hell, if I hold my hand out, I could pass off as Tom Hanks in Saving Private Ryan, given the amount it shakes...

(Eight)

The dread of screwing up, of just BEING up there starts seeping in... suddenly your stomach feels vaguely unsettled, the next thing you know, your entire body has this odd feeling of butterflies and goosebumps and you just KNOW you're going to make a gigantic ass of yourself... In blind panic, your body injects a billion and one hormones into your system and you could just SWEAR you actually feel them washing over your spine...

(Seven)

As you go over your prepared speech (if in fact, you're lucky enough to have one), you play it over in your head, trying out different moods and tones, different ways of saying it, wondering if you'd be better off sounding like a CNN anchorman or a stand-up comic... or maybe a flat out deadpan "I'm a Bruckheimer film General"?

(Six)

As you actually say it out loud to yourself and you can't help wondering how unbelievably shaky your voice sounds, how incredibly unconfident and hopeless it all seems

(Five)

How you suddenly realize that when your excretory system teams up with your nervous system and imagination, they're a bitch, insisting that you need to pee... right there... right then...

(Four)

"Oh shit, I'm going to shit my pants"

(Three)

You think it's best to calm yourself by taking deep breaths. Inhale... uh-oh, I can't breathe... Exhale... damn, my breath feels hot, feverish and laboured...

(Two)

Hmmm, you think I should try the odd joke? The odd one-liner? Probably not, because there's nothing, and I mean, NOTHING worse than tossing a one-liner at the audience and getting NOTHING in return but a stony silence... Earth, swallow me up swallow me up NOW!

(One)

Right... here we go...

(Showtime)

And then everything just STOPS...

Everything just STARTS

Everything just HAPPENS

No jitters, no shudders, nothing... dead calm, you're out there like you were BORN to do this stuff, and nothing else matters... The words are flowing, calm, no jitters, no stutters (ok, maybe the ODD stutter) but you wouldn't really know because you can barely hear yourself

You're in the zone and the zone is a fucking good place to be... the adrenalin's in your system, you own the crowd, the stage lights form your very own personal sun, and this is your moment in it...

And it doesn't matter... On the odd day I can work the crowd, force them into weak smiles if nothing else... most days, probably not though... but like I said, it doesn't matter... good days, bad days, horrid days... I don't even know if I'm good at it... I'm probably NOT... To the crowd I'm probably a stuttering, bland mess, nine out of ten probably aren't even listening, the one who is is probably bored shitless and thinks they could do a better job with their hands tied behind their back...

But it doesn't matter... because the rush is coursing through you, making you feel good, making you feel alive... You're there...

Yeah... you're there...

Damn I love it...

It takes a FrEaK to find a FrEaK...

2005-01-12T16:01:00.000+05:30

It has been a long while since my last entry. No thanks to college and circumstances, personal and this region of the world. They crowded out the time and prevented my thoughts from forming. And so, here I am - left with the most uninteresting blog. Sorry if you have been a faithful follower. It is my fault. I admit. My apologies.

Over the last few days, life has been boring. I really felt the blues. But then, I’m reminded today that joy and satisfaction comes from within. External circumstances never stay the same and if I am to be steady like a rock in my emotions, I can see things from a better perspective. From the inside to the outside.

I had an interesting talk with a friend the other day about christianity. Now anyone who knows anything about me knows I am not sure of the existance of God,but i do not Question his existence. Ideally, if i knew there was a God I would be an awfully smart person. Anyway they tell me to believe in God you have to have faith that he just "does" exist. To me faith is fine and is a wonderful thing. We all have to have faith in something otherwise life is kind of in vain I think myself. Simply, it is hard for me to believe in something I cannot see nor will make itself known. That's just the way I am but I have never knocked anyone for believeing in God. Whatever makes your mop flop is fine with me. They then said to me, what about love, you can't see love either but yet you believe in that. I was kinda stunned actually that they said that. I have seen love many times. The way that I will look at the one I love and the way she will look at me. The way two people that truly love each other, to me that's seeing love. Can't be anything else right? Right !! Love can be seen daily by each of us all if we take the time to look. They proceeded to ask me then why relationships fail if love can be seen that easily. Again to me it was a dumb question. Because faith didn't prevail in the relationship or the other didn't have enough faith in themselves or the other person that loved them. Faith is needed in a lot of things whether it be believing in God or yourself, others and even love. Pretty deep stuff huh ? I thought so too. Out for now.....Be well people......and never give up......I have realized giving up is for the weak.......I am far from weak.....

Those who live in accordance with the Divine laws without complaining .Firmly established in faith, are released from KARMA.

My ThoughTs in BLUE....

2004-12-19T13:10:00.000+05:30

Please bear with me. I have to write and post this. I’m relatively a slow learner, I’ve realized. Sometimes, I need to be hit hard with a sledgehammer for me to listen, act and learn. These are some of the things I’ve learned so far after 22 years of life:

* Yes,The Rolling Stones is right: You can’t always get what you want. But who says what you want matters? What matters more are what other people want and need.(Have,my doubts at this theory though???)

* Michael Jackson may be a pedophile, but you can’t ignore the truth behind the following lyrics of one of his songs:

I’m standing with the man in the mirror
I’m asking him to change his ways
And no message would have been any clearer
If you wanna make the world a better place
Then take a look at yourself and make the
Change! (na na na, na na na, na na, na nah)

* A person is like a computer running on a Windows OS. The program is full of bugs and vulnerabilities. It’s not perfect and may stall and you may consider it as totally unreliable. Good thing is once it encounters a fatal error or you shut it down improperly, it scans and checks itself for errors during reboot. If the problem persists, you can always re-format the hard drive. Or if it’s a hardware problem, you can always replace the affected parts. Nothing and nobody is perfect and everybody deserves a fresh start.

* The entire universe operates on the law of karma. Nobody’s perfect but always make sure you’re doing more good than bad. Probably the universe will offset the remaining good things you’ve done and pay you back with something as equally good. And so since they say “To give quickly is to give twice”, you may always want to give as quickly as you can so as to always have some slack of good deeds (because you’re giving twice as much) and guarantee yourself that your doing more good than harm. But, of course, this is just my theory and not a universal law.

* Life is a series of heartaches and sufferings but never, under any circumstances, give your parents, especially your mother, heartaches. The word “mother” is not considered as the most beautiful word in the English language for nothing. Moreover, parents have suffered and feared for enough seeing their hearts walking, talking and living life in the persons of their children. Although I can only imagine how it feels like to be a parent, I have known many parents, including mine, and can see in them that certain fear for their children. So, be very good to your parents because the law of karma definitely applies to this situation.
* Love is the cure for all the neuroses and character disorders being experienced by all the people in the whole world today. This is according to M. Scott Peck’s The Road Less Traveled. I believe that.

A few Random Jottings...

2004-12-17T22:32:00.000+05:30

The shadow-past is shaped by everything that never happened. Invisible, it melts the present like rain through cavern. A biography of longing. It steers us like magnetism, a spirit torque. This is how one becomes undone by a smell, a word, a place, the photo of himself. By love that closes its mouth before calling a name. ---- Krishna Chaitanya's -- Fugitive Piece

My Quest for spirituality has got its second wind and am on the long walk again.
Often the test of courage is not to die but to live

A quote I often repeat to myself during times of turmoil. It has been in my head for many years. I tried last night, in vain, to remember when I first heard it and what was taking place in my life at the time. I suppose that it really doesn't matter, what does is that I can pull it out of the depths and use it to survive through crisis.
Right now, the pain of the past is competing with the pain of the presence. I feel unable to push either one away, much less deal with them. It is becoming too much...............TIME FOR A RESOLUTION
"You know what kills me most these days? It's watching most of the world waiting on OTHERS to fail in every step they take. Except for a few, the rest of the world is watching OTHERS running in circles and laughing at them."

??????????????????????????????????????????????? i don't have a clue as to what i have just typed............... well thats my state of MIND ......

Lost in the Woods....

2004-12-14T22:56:00.000+05:30

'm sitting here listening to slow jams from RICHARD MARX and STEVIE WONDER and i'm just daydream...about what? just picturing one of these songs in a movie having one of those really sappy and breathtaking scenes : )

I'm real sap...bare with me (hope you guys aren't freaking out lol)

But ya...I sometimes picture myself in a movie and then out of nowhere I bump into my true love...kinda like a Romeo and Juliet moment...errr i'm really getting weird : S

Ya i'm going to stop there. If you want to hear more about this with me, talk to me about it hahaha you'll laugh your head off but *sigh* oh how romantic : ) i'm still waiting on my boo : P

"and you and i were meant to be, and you would know, i was sure by the end of this song"

But if you want to learn about 'true love' read the oh-so-famous chapter about love, 1 corinthians 13.... and I guess I have a lot to learn. Don't get it twisted! Love ain't so real until you read this chapter.(thts wat a wise guy says) Love your parents, your friends, and everything God has given to you. Don't take it for granted.

Later shorties. I'm out.

1 cor. 13:13 - "And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."

Ripped Jeans...

2004-12-02T22:00:00.000+05:30

Karl Marx’s dad was a banker. He loved the mark, adored the dollar, pondered of the pound. His main interest was the interest rate; he could hardly contain himself when he counted up his capital. Karl, the son of a banker, banked his all on a capitalist fall.

It never came. A socialist science doesn’t need to theorize greed. Motor-sport; who owns it; what makes it run? Remove the cigarette money, and the wind no longer puffs your sails. Associate smoking with risk taking petrol-heads, the speed-demons of the track; ‘Smoking Kills’ is now inhaled for the thrills and spills. A fast life requires an expensive habit; a certain style needs a specific brand.

Weathered jeans worn through on the factory floor; skin peeking out, breeze blowing through. ‘Excuse me, would you knock some money off these jeans, they look to be in a pretty bad shape?’ Thin at the knees, weak at the back, falling to bits on the changing room rack. ‘That’s the look Sir, the high prize of fashion.’ Your next motor will be at the cutting edge of fashion, delivered with a bald tyre, to match that worn look. Go on, smack through every fourth wall in your house, rugged and weathered is the style.

Do we beat our parents through rebellion; accept cancer as a friend, and follow a defective trend, just because we must.

“Every generation laughs at the old fashions, but follows religiously the new.”

When Confusion Prevails.....

2004-11-25T21:05:00.000+05:30

i really am confused...most of the time i repress what i feel just to get all this confusion out of my head..i ignore facts and live up life that seems to be ideal..or is it? some says im really confident with everything that i do...or everythintg that i say...but gosh if only someone knows how i really feel inside they'll say that im not really anything ryt now...i mean..i dont think i have a talent..im not powerful or anything..my life seems so ordinary..
and people always go away...well i even dont know if those who are ryt beside me are true friends..(although some are)...since i was young all i want in lyf is to be happy...but there are always circumstances that makes it so unhappy...
i know i shud not be saying this because still im lucky in one way or another because my life has been normal..but if there are already things that bothers me...i cant tell it to anybody anymore...well i tell it to other people but in a way that says..hey i have a problem but i can handle this..well i always say that..and actually i really cant...well i knw i havent experienced the worst yet but there a saying that says suffering is the same for everybody..(not really the exact words)..so when i suffer..i really do suffer...hahay..so drama ako ngayon..well thats my life...

When the DARK SIDE decides to attack......

2004-11-17T18:11:00.000+05:30

I am being plagued by a beast. It is in my home, unwelcome, unwanted.

Where it came from, I don’t know.

Why it is here, I cannot say.

But it means to rile me…

It all started first thing Wednesday morning. My alarm went off at six am, I groggily thumped it in order to end the clattering cacophony coming from my bedside table, then I pulled back the covers and sat up.

Almost immediately – with no provocation on my part - I was set upon by a winged serpent, dive-bombing me kamikaze-like from the roof: it swooped from the ceiling straight at my face, then pulled up at the last minute.

I leaped about six feet off the bed in terror, screaming “fuck!” in a voice so loud that the neighbours next door began thumping at the wall.

Then I saw it….

Perched on the door - laughing at me – was a moth. And not just any moth – this was the Godzilla of moths. This was Tyrannosaurus Moth. This was Darth Moth. This was one of the Four Horse-moths of the Apocalypse.

This was a moth that came straight from Hell….

And it was here for me…

Quickly, I eyed the room for some form of weapon to defend myself against the demon; my eye fell on a brush, still leaning against the wall from where I had been cleaning the night before. That would be my only salvation.

But the dragon was between the brush and me, and it was waiting for me to make the first move. I could hear it taunting me – “You want that brush, don’t you?” it was saying. “Then take it. I am unarmed. Strike me down and your journey towards the Dark Side will be complete…”

The last thing I wanted to do before breakfast was to turn to The Dark Side, but I had no choice. Moving with speed, I leaped across my bed, rolled Ninja-like on the floor and grabbed for the brush.

But the flapping gargantuan was already upon me, and as I reached to defend myself, it attacked - banging off my face, fluttering around the back of my head, soaring high, then swooping to attack once more.

I waved my arms around like Kermit the Frog in an attempt to deflect it, but the punishment still came.

Then abruptly, the attack ceased. I slowly scanned the room to see where the pestering pterodactyl had gone to, but it was nowhere to be seen. With my brush held in front of me, tightly in both hands like a lightsaber, I slowly searched the room – but my winged nemesis had vanished.

Unfortunately it hadn’t gone for good…

and when the dragon returns i hope to fight back,and send it to its doom.................... stand over its CORPSE and say "REST IN PEACE"
until then " MAY THE FORCE BE WITH YOU"

Someone once asked me

2004-11-07T09:57:00.000+05:30

Someone once asked me what i thought of them, me being the terrible on the spot person that i am i had no response, so i guess i can answer that question now or something.

you look marvelous etc, you're intelligent and so on, there i said it.

and AFTER CONFERRING WITH MY LEGIONS OF FANS

Yeah, i'm gonna write a novel, i have deliberated very carefully on this matter and spoken to many people and millions of fans (well just one person, and she's not really a fan, she just likes to agree with me to make me shut up)

but either way i'm oging to write a novel, i'm thinkin sci-fi, i've always been interested in the subject and i think i could do it justice.

STAY TUNED, SAME BAT TIME, SAME BAT CHANNEL.

so, in an effort to write a 150 page novel (of various crap) in 30 days.Earlier, i used to write like a chill'in villain but things happened and i lost alot of creativity, it's been a while and wanted to know what you (my readers ;/) thought i should do.

"Longing"....

2004-11-07T09:34:00.000+05:30

At a point where I'm lost for words
at the end with jus my heart
it's much too cliche
but I'll give it all
than to lye in wait
never knowing
a perfect moment

it's tough that time is against us
your touch fleeting
I miss you so damn much..
as if I do not have enough on my mind
i'm tired of the world
waking up beside you
a memory by which I last each day

I figure I might be obsessed
cos I get nothing done
shut my eyes
and you're standing before me
but ending far too soon
your face etched into my hands
arms outstretched
my silent cry

it hurts to love
so hard, so fast, so real
a tear is shed today
for a tomorrow that is brighter
a painful past
an unsure future
i know not what it holds
promise..
hold nothing back

I've gazed into your eyes a thousand times before.. I've held your hand and kissed your cheek.. and each time I hold you close... i secretly wish.. you would embrace me as you own.. but you show no willingness to open your soul.. it hurts me.. that you shown me nothing after all this time.. i was helpless lost and unsure.. it hurts me.. that you've shunned me.. locked your feelings away.. now i blame you for all the turmoil i feel inside.. i know not love.. or how to love.. i know neither what i want.. nor who to trust..

and as the song goes...............

"A lifetime of fear.. so close to the edge ready to leap off..
Caution flutters in the wind.. This one leap..
and theres no turning back.. Fly or die.."

A fantasy is truly ethereal until you wake up and realize its nothing but thin air, the lines for my fantasy gal always existed but she is nothing but thin air for me till now........................ if only...only if

Nobody knows u like a Stranger

2004-11-06T23:26:00.000+05:30

Its always in a times of loneliness that people express and reminisce of love. A feeling lost and barely out of reach. A memory vivid yet never quite enough.. for you say love is an eternal presence.. one who has walked out of your life.. leaving you shattered.. your heart aching.. and you've forgotten why you bother waking up each morning.. no one understand this void you feel.. the pain..

Sometime very soon the POET in me is gonna wake up.........and RAISE HELL....... i should seriously think about doing something to stop such lines....uffffff

after this post.. i'm heading straight to bed... *yawn* i'm tired.. this week was rather draining.. even though i didnt really do anything significant.. jus been really kinda drained recently.. n looking forward to the hols..
ppreaciate it..

i think god works in mysterious ways too... after my Marketing class.. i managed to get picked to do the assignment with what i felt was the stronger group in my class..

yea.. right about now its sounding super trivial.. n rather primary sch.. n plain superficial.. but at that moment.. jus getting picked did a fair bit to counter that feeling of alienation.. erm.. feeling really dumb right now..

so just to let everyone who loves me know.. muack muack.. that i'm over that...

i'm feeling all good.. hmm.. *yawn*

whats going on.....!!!!

2004-11-06T22:44:00.000+05:30

Not that i don't want to study or revise.
And i know examinations are over.
I also know that i scored badly in the tests.

Problems ARE:

I get sleepy easily..juz by reading the notes, trying to figure out the whys n hows. Thinking that it was because of the stale air in my room, i studied in the living room. I would still be sleepy, somemore...
...Temptations outside in my living room is too great- the computer with its online connection makes me wanna surf the net, play POOL or WORMS...wahhhhh!
I cant focus really...read abt some ABCs theories, "ok..so this is the A's theory". I get up to get a drink, come back and i was like, "hmmmm, what's the theory i was studying abt juz now? B's or C's?? wtf...-.-" *messing with my hair vigourously*
plainly...i think i'm lazy. Short, sweet, cute and nice 4-letter word: LAZY >.<
no urgency feeling. This school did really stress us on the importance of the grades that much as what i used to experience back in the past, thou i know abt "打包" phenomenon that occurs commonly in University..i was thinking: fail? fail lo!

moi 1st CrUsH

2004-10-31T21:58:00.000+05:30

It goes a long way back,back to good old school days. It was in my sixth standard,well that was when i was in this GURL HATER CLUB..... strange isn't it. Never ever in my wildest of dreams did i want a sister, lotta ppl might disagree but having broz is much more fun, its empirical.
While this kid was happily playing around, BANG......CRASH....KABOOM enter shweta........ oh wat a gal, one of the very few gals at tht age with whom i wanted to be pally with.Now lemme describe SHWETA, she should be around 5'6,fair,black eyes, brownish medium length hair, a captivating smile and a enchanting voice.....she was the "IGNITE A SPARK" kinda gal.
Our friendship started in a strange fashion, at KING & CARDINAL (KC) it was a saturday afternoon and as usual we guys had a special class and moi was at KC having a burger and pepsi,shweta too comes there to have lunch but is all alone..... so was i.. we were class mates for a month now but neva spoke to each other. Moi was shocked when she said HI to me,i replied with a HELLO and we started talking about our class etc etc and we even walked back to school together...my 1st ever walk with a gal,from tht day for the next 1 month we spoke to each other daily and every oppurtunity,guess she was amused to spend time with a "TALKING MONKEY"
Come august and i had realized how much i liked her and i would like to think the attraction was mutual,based on the fact tht she spent a lotta time with me. As we started spending more and more time with each other the bond between us started growing stronger and stronger at 12 i didn't have a clue about what was happening but i never wanted it to end. SHWETA used to do these small wonderful things for me,she always used to get biscuits for me,complete my telugu notes,carry a extra pencil box,do my craft work because she never liked tht MOTI craft teacher scolding me. INTERESTINGLY,i started slogging like hell in order to compete with her in the acads dept and a 70% student like me raised and bar and moi avg scores were around 82%..............
SHWETA and me as expected shared a spl bond, we shared a lotta special things together and yes i still have the PERFUMED candle that she gave it to me as a present she got tht for me all the way from pondicherry. As she stayed close to my place,we used to spend saturday afternoons together mostly at moi place playing with my NINTENDO......... GOOF TROOP being our fav game coz we could play it together. somehow SHWETA always wanted to play only those games that she was good at,which i neva quite agreed to. OU campus has been a place where we did spend some time,specially at landscape garden,but our fav hangout was KING & CARDINAL we used to go there every saturday afternoon to eat a burger and also spend some quality time together.
SHWETA and moi had our share of fights too, well she used to hit me if i didn't give her my choclates........ she fought for very petty reasons watelse could you expect from two 12 yr olds.
The best thing abt SHWETA and moi was tht,not only did we like each other a lot but we were also BEST buddies,which further enhanced the liking between us.
This perpetual BLISS lasted for 2 whole years nothing could go wrong i felt like an invincible warrior and incidentally SHWETA happens to be the 1st gal i ever spoke with my father about.
After my 7th standard, i heard the news tht her family was shifting to b'lore nothing ever hurt me more. SHWETA herself never told me this news,but we didn't speak to each other for 1 whole week........ and finally we spoke, before she left i searched a lotta places to find her a gift with which to remember me by abd i presented her a small wooden ship complete with sails and a mast too. SHWETAz family finally left,and the day before they left she came to meet me and spent 3 hours alone with me and that was the 1st and till date the only PECK or anything of tht sort tht i got from a gal and i didn't return the favour cause i was totally pissed off at her for leaving hyderabad. After SHWETA left,i kinda started feeling lonely....took to sports.... somehow i got hardened from inside..... the word CALLOUS entered into my life...........
After 7-8 yrs i finally meet SHWETA again, at LIFESTYLE but alas she was with her FIANCE..... for a moment the FLAME was REKINDLED again. Now shez happily married and hopefully is content with her life.

She might have left me and gone,but SHWETA will always have a special place in my heart.......... she happens to be my PUPPY LOVE.

Looking out of the Window........!!!!!

2004-10-31T19:38:00.001+05:30

Its a another dreamy sunday evening,ye the same time when we sit in our room and stare out of the window.......... but what is it that we are watching.....is it the people,the kids laying in the street or is it LIFE itself......... what is it ???????
Somebody once told me that as a young adult,monday-friday(eve) is career oriented.friday(eve) - saturday is for one's personal pleasure and the whole of sunday should be dedicated to family......... true most of these things are over lapping. But a few minutes ago when i was sitting at the window of my window and staring at the white building across the street,my thoughts started to wander............ they actually were flying... pretty impressive heh....!!!
What actually is this "WINDOW" we are looking out of, it is Your own "LIFESTYLE"......... surprised don't be. A individuals perception of life or society is based on both external(friends, where he hangs out etc) and internal factors (values,principles...etc) and as a person i would certainly look at the outside environment with a predetermined BIAS towards my "way of life" and good or bad would be based on this BIAS.
when we look out of this multi-layered window............. WHAT ARE WE LOOKING OUT FOR..........now isn't this the big Question............. it is in these kinds of moments when a person is vulnerable,he thoughts affect him/her in a such a manner that it creates a BIAS or PREJUDICE in his mind towards another depending not only on his experiences with the person but also based on what friends and family tell YOU about that other person........... sometimes it can be your own decision ...... well Inclination would be a better word ,i would say.
Now these are the moments that LOVE happens,atleast to a certain extent. When you sit all alone with yourself,we start to think and ponder about our interactions with others and if we have happy/interesting time with someone we do a lot of introspection about it and sub-consciously we develop an AFFINITY towards them.]
There goes my very nature of being a " Die Hard Romantic" well atleast believes am 1..... well don't blame me am trying to get in touch with the more refined things in LIFE.
Having spoken about love and solitude we shouldn't forget that these moments can really inspire a person to excel,to be what he always wanted to be cause in these moments of solitude as we start reflecting on our past experiences we feel this potent surge to do what we have not been able to do, it is in these moments that we fall back on the glorious moments of our HEROS........... and trust me its every little boy's dream to be compared with his HERO, and with the resurgence of these thoughts we feel the PASSION rekindled and after that moment it all depends on how bad you want it.

So the "window" we are staring out of isn't actually a window,its actually our personal outlook towards life and what we see outside this window totally depends on the individual...... for the better or for the worse this "WINDOW" of exploration is essential to the very existence of Humanity.

A lil "Introspection'....

2004-10-31T09:53:00.000+05:30

Well, I can honestly say the last couple weeks have been interesting, there has been a lot of stuff going on in my life that I’m not entirely ready to talk about, but there has also been a lot of things going on that I am ready to talk about
lifez been very confusing oflate............... my mindz wandered thru a lotta things of late........... from sex 2 spirituality...... sometimes i wonder when this QUEST will stop........
VISU(cousin) drops in yest and the topic meanders towards spirituality........ he says " there comez a point in every persons life when he/she looks out for GOD and inturn sways towards SPIRITUALITY"........ well until then am a HEDONIST to the core.................
My life doesn't seem to have any particular pattern,a few days ago got into a big arguement with a pal of mine about HINDUISM....... now hez an atehist and doesn't concur to the existence of GOD.... but KC ol'chap finally made him realize tht GOD is the PERCEPTION of human mind.... GOD exists b'coz we humans want it that way.
Ye talking about GOD, i don't Question his presence specially having been brought up in a GOD fearing family..... but am not the the kind of person to discuss RELIGION or PHILOSOPHY with....
I AM NOT AS EVOLVED AS YOU ARE. I CANNOT RELATE TO LARGER ENTITIES LIKE MANKIND OR HIGHER IDEALS EXCPET THROUGH A PERSON.MY GOD HAS TO BE PERSONAL,ALIVE,A PALPABLE PRESENCE.HE HAS TO PERMEATE,MY MIND AND BODY. HE MUST FILL EVERY INCH IN AROUNDME,LIKE MIRABAI'S KRISHNA. IF I HAVE THAT THERE IS NO SCARIFICE THAT I CANNOT MAKE,THERE IS NO RIVER I CANNOT SWIM ACROSS,NO WORK THAT I CANNOT COMPLETE,HOWEVER DIFFICULT.
well,my idea about my kinda GOD seems to have come out ok....

GOD is a PERCEPTION and this PERCEPTION encompasses a lotta things..... which i truly is a lot to talk abt........

The Whatever.........

2004-10-31T01:45:00.000+05:30

To coin a phrase from the great Bogart film Cassablanca, we continue to wait and wait and wait. . . . What are we waiting for? Talking about the "wait" that individuals have to endure, is quite interesting. The so called "wait" of an individual is a direct reflection/reflections of his aspirations and inner most desires. Every individual waits for something in life. If an individuals life is akin to a GRID their always some squares which are left empty,well is that bad, i don't think so. This wait is what carves the character of a person,and as we know CHARACTER IS NOT MADE IN A CRISIS,ITS EXHIBITED.
Their are only 2 things that i always wait for in life,LOVE and SUCCESS its an eternal Quest that never seems to end.....atleast not yet. The worst part with success is an individual is never content with it and LOVE.... don't think am the right person to comment about it........ Disqualified on being a Fresher.
Success always belongs to 1 individual, using him as a channel it conduits through his family and friends but LOVE is a totally different entity. LOVE begets LOVE now this phrase should be thrown out of the window, in retrospect how i wish that phrase so true. If only LOVE begets LOVE,there wouldn't have been a DEVDAS........and ofcourse the legendary DOG..shawl and his whisky bottle.
I always out of curiosity read a few articles on relationships that get published in newspapers,now sometimes i can't stop laughing at them cause they seem so absurd....but the fact of the matter is the remedies or whatever they call it do work....but its a short term arrangement.... Now this is an Empirical statement made my a friend of mine.
" There exist only three things worthy of respect, the priest,the soldier and the poet. To Know,to kill and to Create. Love is always or should i say has been always expressed symbolically using poetry,and Love has always been respected by mankind as the refined essence of Life itself. Once we mention love can music be far behind, and what better words than " After silence, that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is MUSIC"............... Music has been used as an instrument to convey Love not just by the learned but by the layman too,cause as ELVIS once said " I don't know anything about music,i don't need to". Music itself shows the individual a path to express himself.
Love is in the air, all we need to do is to sense it. Its not about finding the perfect lover its about Creating Perfect LOVE.
I started out wanting to write about the "WAIT" of individuals for that few special things in life that we as individual cherish about but it has come out as something totally different,Strange are the ways of blogging.